


Reunited

by ShutUpAndKissMe



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Cancer, Cheating, Death, Declarations Of Love, Divorce, F/M, Fights, Friendship/Love, Love, M/M, Realization, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-05
Updated: 2015-04-28
Packaged: 2017-12-25 18:19:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 41,123
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/956226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShutUpAndKissMe/pseuds/ShutUpAndKissMe
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It had been just over ten years since the decision to take a break was made. Ten years without a single thing from One Direction. The boys were all still friends but they didn't talk to each other nearly as much as they once had. A reunion seemed to be the farthest thing from any of their minds.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

One Direction had decided to take a break so they could experience more than just being a band. They didn't want to break up the band but they just really wanted a chance to live a little without it being known by everyone in the world what they were doing.   
It had been just over ten years since the decision to take a break was made. Ten years without a single thing from One Direction. The boys were all still friends but they didn't talk to each other nearly as much as they once had. A reunion seemed to be the farthest thing from any of their minds.  
Liam and Sofia had been happily married for nine years now. He proposed to her not too long before the band decided to take their break. After it though he had time to sit down with Sofia and fully plan out the perfect wedding with her. They also had three children running around their house. Kaylee and Kelsey were their seven year old twins and Jason was their two year old son who was just now discovering how to make a mess of everything. Since taking the break in the band Liam has been able to focus more of his time on Sofia and his family and he's really loved that.  
Louis and Eleanor on the other hand have not been so lucky. Granted they have a beautiful house and three beautiful little girls, but their marriage has fallen apart. They had pretty much stopped talking to one another unless the girls were around. They'd smile in the audience when they would go to their oldest daughters ballet recitals and they'd hold hands on family walks but behind it all they weren't happy. Eleanor was tired of seeing Louis mope around the house because he didn't feel like his life was complete and Louis was tired of Eleanor nagging him to do stuff he simply didn't feel like doing. He took breaking away from the band the hardest because he hadn't quite decided what he wanted to do outside of it. Yes he wanted to start a family and yes he loved his little girls and his black lab, Teddy, the girls had gotten him for fathers day three years back, but without One Direction he felt empty.  
At first Zayn's life seemed to have soared since taking a break from the band. He met a lovely women named Sasha one night at a concert he went to with some friends. She had beautiful green eyes that he couldn't look away from. After making an initially awkward first move, they ended up dating for quite a few years. Just a year ago they had gotten married with a small ceremony for family and close friends. Zayn thought he was on top of the world. He and his wife had decided not too long ago it was time to try for a baby but that's when it all went wrong. Sasha had gone into the doctor just to double check and make sure everything was okay with her. Unfortunately everything was not okay. They had found a tumor in her brain that had gone undetected for a little too long and was already spreading. Sasha was a strong girl though and Zayn prayed everyday that she'd make it through and he was always by her side.  
Niall had also found the love of his life. When a couple of his friends invited him on a trip to Canada he met Darian at the hotel they were staying at. They really hit it off and continued talking when Niall headed back to Mullingar. After a year of unofficially dating, skyping, texts, and phone calls Darian decided to come out and see Niall for his birthday. Once she got there she didn't want to leave so Niall officially asked her out and asked her to move into his flat with him. After three years of living together Niall proposed to Darian and without hesitation she said yes.  
Harry is the only single one out of the One Direction lads. He doesn't want to be tied down by anyone in particular. He wants to enjoy life and feels he's still young enough to do as he pleases. He has plenty of time to start a family when he eventually wants one.  
•••••  
"Lucy, get down off of the counter." Eleanor said from the computer desk where she was doing work.   
"Mummy, I can't reach it!" 6 year old Lucy replied. Eleanor stood up and walked into the kitchen. She reached for her daughter but she leaned out of El's reach.   
"Lucy Elizabeth Tomlinson, do not pull away from me! I will help you, I just want you to get down first." Lucy got to the edge of the counter so her mum could help her down. "What do you need?" Eleanor asked when Lucy was safely on the ground.  
"I wanted a big bowl for the cherries." Eleanor reached into the cabinet and grabbed a big plastic bowl for her daughter who, after she had it, happily ran back to the dining room. The phone rang and El knew no one else would answer it, so she decided to. The number was one she hadn't seen in a long time but she still recognized it from the endless calls that used to come from this number.   
"Hi Simon." Eleanor answered with a sincere voice.  
•••••  
"Mummy wants to know what you'd like for dinner." Kaylee and Kesley said at the same time to Liam as he sat in the laundry room folding clean clothes.  
"Do I have options?" He gave his little girls a big smile.  
"She said she has chicken and ground beef that she can make into anything." Kaylee said.  
"Well tell mum that if we have pasta then she can make the beef into meat balls. If not then how about you girls decide what she makes."  
"Okay!" The girls said once again in unison and ran out of the room and back to Sofia who was in the kitchen. Liam chuckled to himself. They were too adorable.  
The phone began to ring right as Liam had finished with the clothes. "Can you get that babe? My hands are covered in raw meat." Sofia shouted from the other room.  
"Got it, love!" Liam called back. He grabbed the phone off the charger in the laundry room and checked the caller ID. He nearly fell backwards when he saw who it was.  
"Simon! Hi, haven't heard from you in a long time."  
•••••  
Darian had a bad day at work so Niall thought it'd be nice if he cooked her a nice dinner. He wasn't an expert cook but he could make his way around a kitchen when it came down to it.  
"Smells great in here baby." She said coming out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her body.  
"Not too much longer until it's ready."  
"I don't need to look overly nice for this do I? I really just feel like putting on yoga pants."  
"You can put on whatever you want." Niall flashed her a smile. She smiled back before turning around and walking to their bedroom to change. She left the door open and Niall couldn't help but catch a glimpse as she changed. He could see the look on her face and he knew that she knew she was being watched. He shook his head and laughed before turning back to his food.  
"Looks good!" Darian said looking at the set table and the spread of food Niall had prepared. "Thank you for this." She said giving him a kiss.   
Niall pulled out her chair for her so she could sit and pushed it in once she had. "You had a hard day babe. You deserve this!" Niall sat down in his seat and they both began fixing their plates. Before Niall could get a bite in the phone rang.   
"What the hell? Don't people know it's dinner time!" Niall said aggravatedly before getting out of his seat and heading to the phone. Without even checking the ID Niall answered it.  
"Hello?" He said not hiding his frustration.  
"Niall! Hi it's Simon, I hope I'm not interrupting anything."  
"Simon?" Niall looked at Darian who's head perked up right away. "No, no not at all." His tone changed immediately.  
•••••  
Harry had just headed out with a few friends for the night and planned on having a great time. His friend Taylor said that they were gonna meet a few girls he went to uni with. Harry liked meeting new girls particularly because after a while he got bored with them. He didn't like objectifying women as he'd said many times when he used to get asked by interviewers about it but he just wasn't the relationship type at this point in his life and that wasn't a bad thing.  
"Haz there's this one I think will be perfect for you." Harry snapped out of his thoughts when Taylor called him by his old nickname that was given to him by Louis. He didn't like when his new friends called him by it and Taylor was the only one who didn't see the big deal in it and refused to stop. "Her name is Rachel. She's pretty short and I know you like that."  
"She's got a nice ass too." Jessie chimed in. Jessie had gone to college with Taylor so Harry assumed he knew who this Rachel chick too.  
"Ha hell yeah she does! I'd say it's a solid Kim Kardashian when she was in her prime." Taylor threw a playful elbow into Harry's stomach.  
"Ow! Fuck man that hurt." Harry gave an aggravated look at his friend before increasing his pace so he was a few steps in front of him.  
"The fuck's your problem?" Taylor asked.  
"Just fuck off until we get to the club." Harry heard Taylor scoff but he didn't care. His phone rang in his pocket.  
"Gonna answer that?" Taylor annoyingly asked before it even got to the third ring.  
Harry pressed answer and looked over his shoulder at his friend disgustedly. "Hello?" Harry said.  
"This is Harry right?" A familiar voice asked.  
"Simon?" Harry replied.  
"I guess it is." Simon said with a chuckle.  
•••••  
"Do you think anything has changed?" Zayn said driving his car with Sasha in the passenger seat.  
"I don't know babe. We're gonna figure it out though." Sasha smiled at him but he could see she was unsure. She's a strong woman with everything she's going through but every once in a while Zayn picked up on signs that showed it was wearing on her. How could it not though?  
Zayn's cellphone rang in his pocket but he didn't pay much attention to it. Who ever it was could wait until later when he was home.  
They pulled into the parking lot at the specialists office like they have every other Thursday for the past 5 months now.   
"You can check your phone and see who called. We're early anyway so I'll just be sitting for a few minutes."  
"You sure?" Zayn raised an eyebrow at his wife.  
"Yeah it's fine." She smiled at him before giving him a kiss.   
Zayn pulled out his phone as Sasha walked into the building. A voice mail was left for him from a number he recognized but didn't fully remember.   
"Hello Zayn, it's Simon. I'm just giving a call to all of you today because I think it's about time we have a little chat about that reunion we've kept putting off. Call me back and we can figure something out."  
•••••  
It was the first time Harry had seen any of the boys in a while. He'd been invited to Zayn's wedding last year but didn't go. It was awkward sitting in a room with his former bandmates, or just bandmates rather since they didn't technically break up. He could see the awkward stares of each boy looking at the other, examining each physical change.   
Harry picked up on the tired look on Louis' face. This was the same one he'd get after long nights touring or crazy encounters with fans. Liam looked the same. He still had an over all innocent demeanor and a happy attitude. Zayn looked slightly worn down but it was nothing out of the ordinary. Harry assumed he probably had a newborn that was keeping him up at night now or something. Niall was munching on the big bag of chips he'd walked into the room with. He seemed perfectly content sitting there eating. Nothing about him seemed different. Harry wondered what the boys thought of him. He wished he could just read their minds and know.  
Georgia Hall who was only an intern the last time any of the boys saw her came into the room. "Simon's all set to see you boys now." She flashed them a smile before holding the door for them to enter the all too familiar office.  
"It's been too long since I've had you in here now hasn't it." The boys gave an awkward chuckle in response. It was out of instinct that Liam and Harry sat in the two chairs in front of Simon's desk. Louis, Niall, and Zayn took the couch in the same order they had the last time they came in to finalize the break.  
"I think it's time the world hears from One Direction again boys. Oh, excuse me, men." Simon nodded his head as he looked at each boy.  
Zayn had longer hair than usual. Or maybe it was just the fact that his usual quiff was gone. He was dressed in all black and seemed to be drained of emotions. Simon was determined to get to the bottom of whatever could be wrong.  
Harry looked exactly the same just with a more hollow, more mature face. His hair still had the ability to defy the laws of physics as it always had. He looked slightly distant but that wasn't much different from how he'd stare off in to the distance in general conversations before.   
Over all Louis' appearance seemed to change the least. Besides looking slightly thinner he still had the same face he had when the then 23 year old broke down into tears when the plans were made to take a break. Simon remembered having to stay strong for him but the only time before that, that he'd ever seen the oldest member cry was out of joy when he sent them to the live shows on X Factor. It broke his heart knowing that Louis was so torn up about the break.  
Niall looked the same and the fact that he was eating made Simon think that emotionally he hadn't changed either. He'd probably be devastated if Niall had gone through some crushing depression that made him hate everything but by the way he happily munched on his chips looking around the office with wide eyes reassured him that, that probably hadn't happened.  
Liam had gained a little weight in his face but overall that was the only physical difference. He had a sweet smile on his face and he looked ready to discuss this reunion.  
"So are we basically just getting back together or what?" Harry asked in his usual low voice.  
"Well we need to discuss a come back of sorts. You've been gone for ten years Harry. When was the last time you five were even in a room together?" Simon looked at them as they all thought.  
"Louis and Eleanor's wedding eight years ago." Liam said looking back at Louis who's expression grew even more sad. He could only assume things weren't right between him and El right now.  
"Since none of you came to my wedding." Zayn said under his breath looking out the window.  
"I was on a cruise with my family." Liam said apologetically.   
"There's a thing called a telephone Liam. You could've easily called me." Zayn snapped back at him. "Just be honest and say you did't want to go."  
"Fine. You want honesty? I didn't go to your fucking wedding. Why? I didn't want to be in a room with four boys I used to consider my best friends. Do you know how devistated I was when you four decided you wanted to take a break. I was fine at first when I thought we'd be back together after a few months but no it was years. I invited you all to my wedding because I thought it would bring us together but instead Harry ran around drunk and hit on everything with a vagina, Niall dug in to the buffet and left, Zayn you barely said a word to me, and shocker perfect little Liam was the only one who was even cordial. So no, I didn't want to attend your wedding and I didn't want to see any of your faces after years at failed attempts of reuniting not just as a band but as friends." Louis got up out of his seat and stormed out of the office.  
Simon stood up ready to go after him but he was stopped.  
"Let me." Harry said as he got out of his chair and quickly exited. "Louis!" Harry called after him. He heard the bathroom door down the hall close and could only assume it was him.  
"Louis." Harry said as he entered.  
"What do you want?" Louis was a complete mess standing next to the counter.  
"You know we're trying to discuss a reunion. Something you want more than any of us."  
"Something I wanted. I don't even know who any of you are anymore. How are Liam and Sofia. Do they have kids? Do you have kids? How about Niall, has he found a girl to be with yet? Has he gone gay? What's wrong with Zayn? Things not working out with him and whatever the hell her name is like they aren't with me and Eleanor?!" Louis took a big breath. "I don't even know you guys anymore." Louis looked into Harry's eyes.  
"We have plenty of time to get to know each other again Lou. Simon won't let us reunite until we're acting as if nothing had ever come between us in the first place."  
"I don't want to act though. I want it to be genuine."  
"Louis you know that you're the only one of us who can act is you!" Harry flashed his former best friend a small smile. Louis attempted to smile back. He wondered if Harry picked up on his comment about him having troubles with El. "Ready to go back in there?"  
Louis nodded and wiped away his tears. He looked at himself in the mirror before exiting the room. His face was red but based on his exit he knew the boys wouldn't expect him to come back happy.  
•••••  
"How was it?" Sofia greeted Liam with a big kiss when he walked through the door after his meeting.   
"Simon wants us to spend more time together before we discuss making more music."  
"So the reunion is possible?"  
"It depends." Liam took a seat on the couch. Sofia followed and leaned into him.   
"What do you mean?"  
"Well Louis has a lot of animosity built up towards us for not keeping in touch all of these years so he may be the hardest to crack even if he's the one who wants this reunion the most."  
"Was he not happy to see you all?" Liam loved that Sofia was so interested.  
"None of us really had any emotion going into this meeting. Well none that we expressed until Louis yelled at everyone and stormed out of the room. It was understandable though. We did promise one another to not let this breakup affect our friendship. He was the one we reassured that it wouldn't happen, but then it did. I can't remember the last time I simply shot any of them a text or gave them a call to see if they wanted to come over for dinner." Liam looked up at the ceiling that Kaylee and Kelsey referred to as popcorn. "Am I a bad person?"  
"Just because you let talking to them slip past you does not make you a bad person. You got married and started a family. You have three young children to look after while I'm at work. You aren't always up for chats and hang out sessions with any of your friends." Sofia got off the couch and headed to the kitchen. "Now stop staring at the ceiling. You're 31 and too young to have a mid-life crisis."  
"How would I be having a mid-life crisis?" Liam turned around and looked at her through the breakfast nook.   
"Don't people going through those stare at the ceiling and ponder their life decisions?" Sofia and Liam busted out laughing.  
•••••  
Harry and Louis decided to go out for Nandos after the meeting to catch up. Harry was ready to catch up with the person he'd been the closest to at one point in his life. It was sad to think of how distant they'd grown but he was extremely relieved when Louis agreed to grab a bite with him.  
"So what's going on with you?" Louis asked as he dug into his chicken.  
"I haven't changed much." Harry replied.  
"Nice cop-out answer Haz." Louis rolled his eyes as Harry stared at him. "What?"  
"You called me Haz." Harry smiled slightly.  
"Haven't heard it in a while?"  
"Not from you. My dumb ass friend calls me it all the time to annoy me."  
"I didn't realize it annoyed you." Louis look down at his plate.  
"No! It doesn't. It annoys me that he says it. It's the nickname you gave me. It's our thing, not his." Louis looked up and smiled so his old friend could calm down a bit. "But seriously I haven't changed. I'm not married, no kids, not planning on either anytime soon."  
"You never seemed like the type to settle down relatively young."  
"I'm 30, Lou. I'm not that young anymore."  
"You still have time to start a family in a couple of years. You never know what the future holds." Louis couldn't believe he was sitting here with the same kid he'd met so many years back, talking about being too old to start a family.  
"What about you?" Harry asked. He looked directly into Louis' blue eyes, ones he hadn't seen in so long. Too long.  
"Three little girls. They got me a dog a few years back so I could have another male in the house."   
"Oh cute! How old are they?"  
"Is it too cheesy if I pull out pictures I have in my wallet?" Harry shook his head. He wanted to see them and see who the girls looked more like. "Lucy is the oldest. She's nearly seven." Louis pointed to the school picture of a girl with dark brown hair that matched her dad's. She had the same smile as Eleanor but there was no doubt she was blessed with Louis' beautiful blue eyes.  
"This is Ashlynn." Louis showed Harry the picture of a little girl leaning up against the big black dog that must've been the one Louis referred to earlier.   
"How old is she?" Harry asked.  
"She's four. I just switched this picture out for a really little one of her." Louis went to the last picture. "This is our little baby Michelle. She's just over a year now but this was taken when she was born."  
"She's adorable." Harry said looking at the picture. Eleanor was laying in the hospital bed holding the new born with a smile. Louis examined the picture too. "How's things with El? I did hear what you said in the bathroom earlier you know."  
Louis' happy expression faded. He'd forgotten that he mentioned anything about his marriage troubles. "We're just in a rough patch right now."  
"You said things weren't working out." Harry used the exact words Louis had before.   
"It's just hard to explain I guess. We don't like being in the same room as each other unless it's for the girls. I mostly sleep on the couch just so I don't have to be around her. We only talk when the girls are around but when we run out of things to talk about she'll fake a call and head to the bedroom or some room that we're not in."  
Harry never thought things could ever get so bad with Louis and Eleanor. It was really sad to hear because he'd always seen them as a together forever sort of couple.   
"But whatever. It is what it is." Louis quoted the words that spread across his chest that he'd gotten done so many years. One of the few tattoos he didn't get as a complete impulse.   
Louis took a few more bites of his food in the silence. Harry didn't like how he sounded like he'd given up.  
The two finished their food quickly after they stopped talking.   
"So are you gonna come bowling with us tomorrow?" Harry asked. At the end of the meeting Simon said he'd make arrangements for the boys to go bowling with their families. He wanted them to get close again.  
"I will, the girls will probably come too but I don't know about-"  
"It's fine. We can just say when you got home yesterday she was laying on the couch horribly sick with some stomach bug." Harry shrugged it off like it was nothing. Louis gave him a small smile before looking down at his empty plate. Harry still had his back.


	2. Chapter 2

Louis held hands with his four year old and had baby Michelle's carrier tightly in his hand. His eyes were glued to Lucy as she carelessly skipped ahead of her dad. As much as he hated the boys right now, he was finding himself excited to introduce them to his girls and meet the people in their lives.  
As he walked through the door, two girls about Lucy's age sauntered around as a little boy cooed around them on the floor.  
"Jason, come over here darling!" Liam called out to the boy before picking him up and placing him on his hip.   
"Girls, please be careful and watch out for people around you." Sofia said to the twins as her eyes landed on Louis. "Oh my! Don't you have a full load, dear."   
Louis placed Michelle's carrier on the ground as he went in for Sofia's approaching hug. She greeted him as if no time had best and they were all still the best of friends.  
"Really good to see ya, Lou! Some beautiful girls you have here. Those two goofballs running around are Kaylee and Kelsey. They'll have no trouble explaining how you can tell them apart later on. Definitely not shy, them two. The little daddy's boy over there is Jason. What about yours?"  
Louis took in all the names she'd given before answering. "Lucy's the oldest. She's a little quiet until she has a challenge in front of her. Quite stubborn like I can be. Definitely my child. This one here is Ashlynn and she'll have no trouble being the life of that party if you let her. And the loudest, most dramatic of them all would have to be this one here, Michelle." Louis and Sofia both giggled at the little baby who was sleeping away in her little seat.   
"Adorable girls you've got, mate." Liam said as he approached with Jason on his hip. "Good to see ya. I think today will be good despite the rough start we got off on yesterday." Louis nodded, trying to convince himself that he agreed. "The others are in the back. We were just waiting for you."  
"I would've been here earlier but uh... El wasn't feeling to well when I left. Just making sure she was well off before heading out." Louis felt strong in his lie. His wife was the reason he was late, but it was more or less the immense amount of shouting about how he didn't give a shit about her that kept him from getting here on time.  
"It's alright, Louis. We knew you'd show up." Liam flashed him a smile before the lot of them headed to the back to meet the others.  
"Louis!" Niall yelled excitedly as he shot up out of his seat. The woman by his side stood too with a smile on her face. Louis couldn't help but notice the massive sparkler on her ring finger. Guess Nialler didn't go gay after all!  
"Nice to finally meet you." She started with, shaking Louis' hand. "I'm Darian, Niall's finace." Her smile seemed just as genuine as the loving look that Niall was giving her as she shook his old friends hand.  
Louis noticed no one by Harry's side. He felt relief for some reason that Harry hadn't just humoured him yesterday at lunch when he said he was single.   
"Well, everyone, this is my wife Sasha. Ya know since-"  
"Zayn!" Sasha gently elbowed him. "Don't start on that. It's in the past." She stood and readjusted the beanie on her head. "It's really nice to meet everyone and hopefully we can all get off on a good foot for this reunion!" Sasha flashed a smile as she sat back down. Zayn placed a protective hand on his wives leg. He smiled warmly at her before planting a kiss on her forehead.  
Louis could still see the tired look in his old mates eyes. His marriage seemed okay though and there were no children with them so it couldn't be from that. Sasha was skinny as a rail too so there was no way she was "with child" either.  
Louis felt a tugging on the back of his shirt and turned around to see two near identical looking girls staring up at him with wide grins.  
"Hi!" They said in unison. "I'm Kaylee" said the one dressed in pink. "And I'm Kelsey" called the other who wore yellow.  
"Very nice to meet you, girls!" Louis said with a genuine smile. He'd always loved children and no matter what was going on with him, he could always be cheery for kids.  
"You can tell I'm Kaylee because I don't have my two bottom tooths and I like pink. I always wear pink. And my hair is darker than Kelsey's. And curlier." The seven year old went on as if it were all one sentence before her sister took over.  
"And I'm Kelsey because I have my tooths, except for this top on and this one is loose. And I wear yellow. It's my favourite. And my hair is light and straight and Kaylee's isn't so I'm Kelsey."   
The girls were absolutely adorable and Louis giggled at their excitement. "Well I'll definitely be able to tell you two apart now. Hey, girls. This is my daughter Lucy." He pointed to the girl sitting criss-cross on the chair just to his left. "She's just about your age and I think the three of you could get on pretty well." Shifting his attention to his daughter, "Lucy, how about you say hi to Kaylee and Kelsey." Lucy shyly nodded before getting up and walking over to them. Despite being a few months their junior, Lucy was taller than the twins but Louis knew that wouldn't last. Eleanor and Louis weren't terribly tall and definitely didn't match the genes that Liam possessed in height.  
Louis turned around to attend to Ashlynn to tie her shoes but he could hear the giggle behind him of three girls. Relief coming over him that Lucy made friends with them quickly.  
"So, Harry. No girls or kids for you?" Liam called out as he bounced a giddy Jason on his knee.  
"Nope. Flying solo for right now. Have for a while actually. I go on dates here and there but nothing special, I guess." Harry shrugged his shoulders as he slinked a little lower in his seat.  
"Looking for anyone or just kinda wondering around?" Niall called out.  
"I'll meet someone eventually. Just not really in the mood to settle down yet. I thought with the break I may have wanted to but it only made me want to do the opposite. I bought a big house only to sell it for a better bachelor pad. Too much space for just one guy, ya know? The whole married and kids thing kinda freaks me out.... no offense!" He added as he looked at all the couples who had or wanted kids.   
"None taking. It's not for some people. I mean I thought I woulda been a single pringle for a while until this one decided to stalk me back to Ireland!" Niall nibbled at Darian's ear and she giggled at him.  
Louis met Harry's gaze. He wondered if Harry could tell how awkward he felt around all the happy couples. They were the two odd men out with their former band mates. Everyone was so happy and here Louis was on the verge of losing it all and Harry hadn't even started.  
"How's Eleanor, Lou?" Zayn asked, snapping Louis out of his trance with Louis and bringing him back to reality.  
"She's pretty good." Louis through out his traditional cop-out that he used whenever anyone asked about her without a second thought. His mum, Stan, his sisters. All the people he's put off seeing since him and Eleanor have been having their troubles. "She wanted me to tell everyone she's sorry that she couldn't make it but she's been pretty down and out with some sort've bug for the past couple of days. It's not contagious anymore but she's just not up for public outings yet."  
Louis caught Harry's wink as he lied his ass off to the people he was supposed to be reconnecting with.   
"Notice the names yet, Lou?" Niall pointed to the screen, changing the subject without it even being necessary yet. Louis was still prepared for more questions about his wife and how things were going. Now he could save his lies, excuses, and diversions for later on. Louis looked to where Niall was pointing and some all too familiar nicknames flashed up for them.  
Boobear, Nialler, Badboi, Hazza, and Leeyum lined one screen. Louis could feel his heart beat a little faster as those names took him to the way beginning of One Direction.   
He looked at the screen again only to see the twins, Lucy, Ashlynn, Sofia, Darian, and Sasha on the other screen which reminded him just how much times had changed since then. Louis' heart hurt a little for old times as he tied his own shoes. So much had changed and although he felt as though the people in front of him were still his best mates, still the same people. But they weren't. He wasn't. He was hiding a heartbreaking secret from them as they were all there smiling with their families. He had Harry but even then Harry could still find someone someday soon and leave Louis to his own devices.  
"Ready to go, Lou?" Harry said in his same deep, rough voice. One Louis loved and deeply missed all these years.   
"Daddy! You go first!" Lucy called out with a wide grin on her face.   
"I'm a little rusty." Louis said as he stepped on the approach and grabbed the ball. Staring at the pins, Louis took off and with near perfect aim, all the pins fell.  
"Rusty my as- bum... Sorry, not used to children just yet!" Harry said as he stood up and cheered with the others.   
The game went on and Louis ended up beating everyone with a 176 game. Sofia second by only 8 pins. Louis enjoyed taking his girls out. It was their first time bowling and even Michelle was all smiles after her nap.   
They munched on pizza before their second game started and talked about different One Direction memories that everyone had heard twenty-times over. They laughed and joked and carried on like nothing had changed. They were best mates again, all of them barely in their twenties getting a round of bowling in, in whatever town they had landed in. Trying to be discreet and get away from it all a bit.   
After the bowling was done and all the arcade games had been played and the pizza and soda was all finished, it was time to go home. Liam and Sofia packed up their little family while Niall attempted to carry Darian bridal style out of the bowling alley as she cracked up, quickly opting to just hold her hand as Zayn was doing with Sasha who gradually during the day seemed to grow very tired.   
Louis gathered his girls to realisation that he was going to have to go home and face his shitty existence.  
"When are we going to see them again? Uncle Niall is funny!" Lucy said as they walked out the front door. Louis smiled at her calling him "uncle." It was something the boys had always pictured their children calling one another so many years ago.   
"Probably soon. Uncle Liam was thinking about having everyone over dinner later this week, darling."  
"Would mummy come?" Ashlynn called out from the right of Louis.  
Louis' heart hurt for his little girls that didn't understand the trouble that their parents were going through. How they could barely fake it for children who didn't understand, let alone trying to fake it for four boys that knew him better than anyone ever had. He'd have Harry to help out and cover for him but Eleanor couldn't be "sick" forever unless he told them she'd come down with some sort of terminal disease. But that'd be cruel to do just to hide his marriage troubles.  
"Maybe." Louis replied a moment later. "She hasn't seen them in a while either. She's fond of them, at least she used to be."  
Louis belted all the girls in their seats before taking off for the house. Thoughts circling his head as to what was next, not just for his career, but for his life.  
•••••  
"Zayn, dear?" Sasha called out from the huge tub in their master bathroom.  
"Yes, babe?" Zayn repeated as he strolled in from the bedroom, sitting on the edge of the bath.  
"I don't know how much more of this I can do. I was so tired today after just a few rounds of bowling and when I got home and took off the beanie, more of my hair was gone. Literally clumps are falling out every hour. I'll be completely bald by the end of the week at this rate." Zayn tried to interject but she continued. "I think Sofia could suspect something, when I was talking to her she asked about us having kids and I said right now wasn't a great time. She asked why but lucky for me I was up and she never brought it back up. I had fun but this can't be our secret for much longer, baby. When I see my specialist tomorrow and he sees how much of a toll this is having on me, he's going to want me to go to the hospital and see if it's spread even more since the last time." Sasha could see the fear in her husbands eyes. "Zayn, I know this is hard to think about but we caught it late and my father died of almost the same exact kind of thing when I was a teen and his mum before him. It seems to run in our family and I just never even thought of checking it out until it was too late."  
"But if it's spread, then they'll take you away from me." Zayn knew he sounded selfish, so he lowered his head.  
"Baby, I know. It hurts me too that I couldn't wake up to you everyday, but you could still come and see me whenever you wanted. Whenever it fits your new schedule with the band getting back together."  
"But you being in a hospital bed with machines and doctors and what not.... It'll really seem real." Zayn felt tears forming but he blinked them away.  
"It is real, darling. They said I only had-"  
"I know." Zayn cut her off. He didn't like when she would remind him of how much time the doctor gave her to live. Ever since then, they'd been making a bucket list of everything they wanted to do before she got worse. But Sasha got worse quickly. Only a few things had been crossed off the list that now laid buried under a bunch of other papers on Sasha's desk in their home office.   
Zayn helped Sasha get out of the tub, as she was too weak to get out herself lately. The baths were soothing to her bones though so Zayn never complained when he had to drain the water and carefully help her to her feet. Gently wrapping a towel around her frail body.  
"I love you, Zayn." She leaned in and kissed him softly on the lips.  
"I love you too." Zayn pecked her forehead and contemplated what was next as she shuffled to the closet. The reunion was the least of his worries right now but seemingly at the forefront of everyone elses minds. He didn't want to be the reason it got put off again, especially after such a great day today.


	3. Chapter 3

Niall rolls over in his bed and opens his eyes to an empty side. Sitting up, he looks for Darian and wonders why she's not there for him to cuddle.   
"Dare?" He calls out to the townhouse. He hears faint sounds coming from the direction of the spare room/office. Niall gets up and follows the sound to see Darian pacing back and forth while on her phone.  
"Hey babe." she mouths as she continues to listen.   
"Niall's up, I've gotta go." A pause, "love you too, bye-bye." She says quick before hanging it up. It was a dry goodbye as she places her phone down on the desk.  
"Your mum?" Darian nods and walks into Nialls open arms.   
"Want breakfast?" She says to him as she rests her head against his chest.   
"Is that even a question? And a nice hot shower after." Darian looks up at Niall and the cheeky expression on his face.   
For some reason, Saturday morning shower sex had become a thing with them and weirdly enough, it never got old.  
•••••  
"Liam, babe, why don't you just give everyone a ring and see if tonight for dinner would be good?" Sofia says from the floor as she plays blocks with Jason.  
"Yeah, that sounds good." The boys had been in constant communication since the bowling trip a few days ago but they hadn't actually gotten together since.   
Liam headed for the phone in the kitchen and dialed in Harry's number first.   
"Hello?" A groggy boy said on the other line. Well as much of a boy that an almost 31 year old man could be.  
"Hey, Harry! It's Liam. Sofia and I were wondering if you'd want to come for dinner tonight. I'm gonna call the others and see if they want to come too."  
"Uh.. yeah sure, Li. I'll be there. Just need a time and address."  
"Oh yeah, duh! How about I text you that so you have it in your phone?"  
"Yeah that works. Thank for the invite, mate. I'll see you tonight." Harry hung up before Liam could say goodbye, but he didn't take too much offense to it. He just shot off a text to his friend before dialing the next one.  
Zayn and Niall were both down to come, all that was left was Louis.  
"Hello?" A female voice answered.  
"Eleanor?"   
"Liam?" She said back.  
"Yes! Hey El, haven't talked to you in a while. How are you feeling?"  
"Umm pretty good. Why do you ask?"  
"Oh, Lou told us you've been a little under the weather when we went bowling. Figured I'd check up on how you are."  
"Oh.. well pretty good. Getting better." Eleanor wasn't defending Louis, she too just didn't want them involved in her personal issues with her husband yet. "So what can I do for you, dear? Louis went out with the girls to get some groceries a little bit a go if you wanted to talk to him, you can try his cell."  
"No, it's fine. Sofia and I were just wondering if Lou, you, and the girls would want to come for dinner tonight. The others will all be here so it should be fun. Probably dinner, dessert, and some games or something."  
Eleanor rolled her eyes and sighed as quietly as possible. Liam was a dear but she didn't need this right now. She hated being around Louis right now and she had a terrible time acting as though she didn't mind him. "Sounds fine with me. I'll let Louis know. You can text him a time and where you live and we'll be there." She said in a chipper voice. She wanted to find a way to get out of this but it'd been so long since she'd seen the boys and she was interested in getting together. She missed out on bowling because she had a meeting with her lawyer that she had to attend to. She was excited to see the others and that would be her justification for an outing with her husband.  
For a moment, Eleanor questioned how things had gotten so bad with the man she'd wanted to spend forever with. But she knew that ever since the band took their break and more time passed without any word of them getting back in the studio, Louis grew more and more depressed. They paid for counseling, medication, therapy, retreats, the whole lot but he only grew further away from himself. He changed into someone she didn't know. She'd be more than willing to fall back in love with her husband if she saw the Louis she met 14 years ago but until that time, she'd keep meeting with her lawyer until she couldn't take it anymore and officially get the papers she'd need to end this. It was making her a miserable person too and she couldn't have that with three kids, a job, and a life to live.  
•••••  
Harry showed up twenty minutes later than the time Liam wanted him there because his GPS took him down some shit back road and got him lost. Judging by all the cars in the drive-way, Liam and Sofia were either extremely loaded - which could totally be the case seeing as all the money One Direction made could keep them good for a life time - or the others were all there.   
He knocked on the door when he approached and waited for someone to come answer.   
"Get lost, Harry?" Liam said as he greeted him with a hug.  
"Yeah just a little. GPS took some weird route here from my place."  
"It's alright, mate. Sofia's just now finishing up making dinner so you're pretty much on time anyway."  
Harry smiled and walked in, leaving his shoes at the door by everyone else's. The house smelled of roast chicken and other warm smells wafting from the kitchen. It was something Harry missed out on a lot. He mainly got take away with his friends or something from a box. Home cooked meals were a rarity except for when he'd visit his parents.  
When Harry entered the dining room, he noticed an empty seat by Louis. "This taken?" He asked when he approached.  
"Hey Haz." Louis said quietly, his eyes red and almost teary for some reason.   
"Lou, what's wrong?"   
"Nothing... you can sit there. Eleanor is sitting on this side." Louis patted at the seat to his right.   
"Wanna talk about it later, babe?" Harry said affectionately as he took his seat. Louis nodded his head in response and scooted his chair closer to his former best friend. Harry placed his arm around the chair.  
"Dinner is served!" Sofia sing-songed as she placed the final component of dinner on the table and took her seat next to Liam. All the kids were munching away on their food at the small round table Liam had dug out earlier.   
There was a low roar as everyone talked while fixing their plates. Niall mainly went on about how good everything looked as he filled his plate to the point of over flowing.   
"Got enough, babe?" You could hear Darian say as she placed some green beans on her plate.  
"Never!" Niall said before shoveling some mashed potatoes into his mouth. Darian just rolled her eyes and giggled playfully.  
Conversations went on about different things that everyone had been up to and of course old band stories as they ate dinner and made their way to dessert. They continued to talk at the table even after everyone had full stomachs. Just continuing to catch up and everything that's been going on over the past ten years.   
It was until Jason tugged on Liam's pants to tell him just how tired he was that they realised how long they'd all been carrying on.   
"Oh wow! It's way past your bed time, buddy." Liam said as he pulled his look-a-like son into his lap and gave him a kiss on the forehead. "I'm gonna take this little bugger to bed and then we can continue on."   
"Kels and Kaylee can stay up a little past bed time if they want to take Lucy and Ashlynn to the theatre room or something."   
"Actually, I was just about to say I had to take the girls home. Bed time for them too." Eleanor said, almost with a cold edge. Louis knew she wanted to get of here. She enjoyed catching up but sitting here with him was making her skin crawl.  
"Why don't you just bring Michelle and Ash home. Lucy is getting along so well with the twins. Maybe she could just stay the night here." Louis said to her.  
"Dear, Lucy doesn't have any of her belongings here for a sleepover. Don't be silly. We need to go home." Eleanor said without even trying to hide her growing anger.  
"The three of them are nearly the same size, El. I think she could manage one night."  
"Louis." She said firmly.   
"No, it'd be fine, Eleanor. If you want to leave Lucy here, I'm sure we could let her borrow some pajamas and we have extra toothbrushes and things around here somewhere." Sofia added, helping Louis out.  
"Maybe another time. We have things to do tomorrow." Eleanor stood up and grabbed Michelle out of the highchair Liam had gotten out of the attic for her to use. "Louis, let's go." She said placing the baby in the carrier.   
"I can give him a ride home, Eleanor. We're all still catching up." Harry said.  
"Harry... sure." Eleanor said reluctantly. She'd get the chance to be away from Louis for a bit this way and she knew that.  
"Come on girls. Lucy, Ashlynn, say goodbye to everyone." The two little girls waved goodbye to everyone. Lucy even gave Niall a long hug before heading out with her mum.  
"I think you're her favourite uncle, Ni."  
"I mean, how could I not!" Niall said. They all laughed and Liam finally returned.  
"Where's Eleanor and your girls, Louis?" He asked as he took his seat.  
"Headed home. Bed time for the little ones." Louis shrugged his shoulders.   
"Hey, why don't we boys head to my little man cave downstairs and have all the girls catch up and get to one another?" Liam suggested.  
"Do you doubt how well we already know each other?" Sofia jokingly said.  
"And how many juicy secrets we've already shared about you all?" Darian said with a cheeky grin. Sofia and Sasha following suit.  
"Oh whatever!" Liam laughed as he stood up, the other four boys following. He showed them all down to his man cave which consisted of a bar, big screen, and various old arcade games and a pool table.  
"Nice set up, Liam." Zayn said as he look at the old game machines.  
"Yeah, maybe one night we can have an adult party without the kids and I can put some use to this bar. I swear, Sofia and her girl friends from work use this thing more than I have."  
"Because you're such the party animal drinker!" Louis said.  
"You corrupted me a while back, Lou. Don't you remember!"   
"Ha, how could I forgot!" Louis said as he plopped down on the sofa in the room.   
"Darian's already gonna drive home. We took her car here, so do you think I could have a pint from your bar, Li?" Niall asked, nearly begging.  
"Sure thing, buddy." Liam said as he went behind the bar and poured his friend his favourite.  
"Ahhh." Niall let out after a long sip. All the guys laughed at his traditional satisfaction beer gave him.  
They weren't down there for too long before Zayn said he'd probably duck out. Something about having something to do with Sasha fairly early in the morning and not wanting to be too tired for it. They all said goodbye as he made his way upstairs.  
"It's really good that it didn't take much to be friends again. Quite like old times, no?" Liam said.  
"I didn't think it'd be this easy, to be honest. Sorry for all the trouble I caused at that meeting. If I'd known we could just go back to being best mates, I'd never have thrown such a fit." Louis apologised.  
"How were you supposed to know, Lou?" Liam said. "The five of us are just meant to be in one anothers lives. Guess it doesn't matter how much time we spent apart."   
"Ni?" Darian called from the top of the stairs to the man cave. "Ready to go, babe? I'm getting tired."   
"Be right up!" Niall called out. "Meeting with management Monday morning, see you guys there!" Niall said before heading up to his fiance.  
"Should we duck out too, Lou?" Harry said putting his arm back around Louis as it had been earlier when they all talked after dinner. "Getting pretty late."  
"Yeah, we can go." Louis sighed as he spoke. Wanting to leave but at the same time not wanting to go home.  
"I'll follow you up. Gonna help Sof get the girls to bed. Probably all hyped up from having so many people over. But I'll see ya Monday!" Liam gave them both hugs when they got to the front door.  
"Bye!" Sofia called out as they left.   
They were silent as the headed to Harry's new Range Rover. Louis noticed that it still had the new car smell as he got in it.  
"Sorry about that whole Eleanor ordeal. I tried to keep it calm so they wouldn't suspect anything."  
"Think they did?" Louis asked.  
"I don't know, love." Harry put the car in reverse and pulled out of the long driveway.  
"Doesn't really matter. They'll figure it out eventually. I can act like everything's fine but she can't. She's gotten worse at it and I'm just bracing myself for the day she hits me with some divorce papers and a court order to leave her with the kids and the house. I'll get the dog and my car and the guilt of knowing I couldn't keep it together for her."  
"Lou.... babe, maybe things will get better know that we're getting back together. We know it tore you up pretty bad. You're your old self around us, like nothing's changed. Maybe she'll see that and fall for you again?"  
"I think it's beyond that point. So much shit has gone down between us lately that I think it's way beyond repair. Not even me becoming myself again can change it."  
"I'm sorry, boo. It really sucks." Harry looked over at Louis who had tears in his eyes and Harry's heart ached for him.   
"It is what it is." Louis said. The quote on his chest, the meaning of his life. Fairly fitting.   
Louis directed Harry to his house. His heart sinking when they finally arrived.  
"Thanks for the ride, Haz."  
"Welcome, boo." Harry smiled at him and Louis gave his best attempt at one back.  
Louis walked up to a locked door with no key and Eleanor stopped leaving out a spare years ago when their neighbor's house got broken into for that very reason. Louis turned around to see no new range rover in the drive.  
A tear rolled down his cheek for getting his phone out of his pocket and dialing his wife. After three rings he was forward to voice mail and from the door he could see the bedroom light upstairs being turned out.   
Well that was that, Louis was locked out. So he decided to call Harry back up.  
"Lou?" Harry answered.  
"She locked me out and didn't answer the phone." Louis could hear his own voice cracking as he spoke. He felt like a hopeless child.  
"I'll be there in just a minute to get you. You can stay the night at my place, babe. Okay?"  
"Thanks Haz. I love you." He said into the phone. Another tear rolling down his cheek.  
"Love you too, boo. Be there in just a second." Harry and Louis hung up at the same time and only a few seconds later, Harry's headlights were filling up the drive way again.  
•••••  
"Sorry, they're a little big on you." Harry said from his bed as Louis walked in, wearing a pair of Harry's old sweat pants.  
"Good god, I feel like you've only gotten bigger. Or I've shrunk!" Louis laughed. "Have a spare bedroom?"  
"It's actually been turned into my attempt at an office." Harry said.  
"Couch?"   
"You can stay in here Lou, I don't bite." Louis smiled and happily crawled into bed with Harry. Both of them getting under the covers at the same time. Louis actually wanted this. To feel Harry's warmth.   
"Wanna cuddle?" Harry joked but Louis genuinely nodded his head. It'd been a while since he'd had anyone to cuddle. Him and Eleanor didn't even share a room anymore. All his stuff had been moved into the guest room. It was rare that anyone stayed with him. Both her parents and his knew they didn't get along and there was no point in visiting just to hear arguments night after night. "C'mere." Harry grabbed Louis and pulled him close to his chest. The blue light from the tv filling the room as Louis got comfortable in Harry's arms. He missed this. They used to cuddle a lot. Nothing affectionate, always friendly. But this felt right, almost romantic as Harry gently ran his fingers through Louis' tousled locks.   
Louis let out a deep break before closing his eyes. Comfortable in the arms of his best friend, he drifted off to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Louis was woken up to the sound of Harry's house phone ringing.  
"I'll get it." Harry said in his deep and rough morning voice that sent a chill down Louis' back. It'd been so long since he'd heard it in person.  
"Hello?" Harry answered. "Yeah, he's right here." Harry handed the phone to Louis.  
"Hello?" He said in his less sexy, less deep, less rough morning voice.   
"Where the fuck are you, Louis?" Eleanor snapped at him.  
"Quite obviously I'm at Harry's where you found me."  
"Why the hell are you over there? Nearly gave me a heart attack when you weren't in your room this morning!"  
"You make me sound like I'm son as opposed to your husband."  
"Bullshit, Louis. It's how you act anyway! Why the fuck are you over there?"  
"You locked the door and didn't take my call when I wanted you to unlock it last night. I wasn't spending the night outside so I went home with Harry."  
"Just get your ass over here. I need to go somewhere and the girls need to be watched."  
"Can't you just take them with you. I'm going to lunch with Harry in a bit." Harry perked up and looked at him knowing it wasn't in the plans but would be happy to.  
"Listen, Louis. I don't care what shit plans you made with your old bestie. I need you over here in an hour and no later." Eleanor hung up without even leaving him a choice. Pretty much how his whole life goes now.  
"I've gotta change and head home."  
"Need me to drive? I mean you can walk if you want but it may take a while."  
"Thanks, Haz. Sorry about her."   
"No it's fine. I understand. I can make other plans for lunch." Harry said jokingly as he through on a shirt and some pants over his boxers. He threw a sock at Louis as he put on his jeans from last night.  
"Prick!" Louis threw it back, nearly tripping over his pant leg in the process.   
Harry cracked up at the sight of it. Louis buckled and zipped his pants and made his way to Harry. Giving him a light smack on the face.   
"You're so abusive, Lou!" Harry cackled as he spoke. Louis cracked up at Harry as he fell to the ground from laughing so hard. Purposely, Louis fell on top of him.   
"Fat ass!" Harry joked and poked up Louis' sides. The two of them acting like giddy little kids. Out of nowhere, in the middle of their child-like banter, Harry leaned up and kissed Louis' lips. It was sweet and loving. Not knowing where it came from, Harry immediately backed up, letting Louis sort of slide off of him.   
"What-"  
"I don't know." Harry cut off Louis and stood up. Louis just looked up at him from the floor with a confused look. "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to, Louis. Let's just uh.. let's just forget about that. Okay? Got a little carried away."  
"It's fine, Harry." Louis stood off and flattened out his shirt. There was a knock on the door as Louis slipped into his shoes.  
"I'll be right back." Louis nodded as Harry left the bedroom.  
Harry shook his head as he went to answer the door. Truly confused as to why he'd do such a thing as randomly kiss Louis like that. Kiss him with such passion out of nowhere.  
Harry opened the door to a face he hadn't seen in a while. "Bree?"  
"Hi, Harry." She said blandly, clearly not excited to see him.  
"It's been a while since I've seen you."   
"Has been, hasn't it." Still not even excited in the slightest; Bree and Harry had a thing a few years back but it wasn't serious. They never put a label on it but they fucked a few times a week for a couple months and it was some of the best sex Harry had in his life but one day, out of nowhere, it stopped. He got a text from her simply saying "whatever we are is done." And he hadn't heard from her since. Well until now that is.  
"We need to talk, Harry." She said.  
"Listen, Bree, I appreaciate you just dropping in out of nowhere but I actually have to go somewhere right now."  
"Harry, it's important." She said. Harry looked behind him at Louis in the living room, ready to go, then back at Bree. But then something just passed her caught her attention. It was her black car running in his driveway. He could see a little girl in the back seat sucking on her thumb with her eyes closed. She had thick dark ringlets of hair reaching her chin. Harry felt his heart sinking.   
"Is that..." Bree followed Harry's gaze to her car and nodded as she looked back at him.   
"Harry?" Louis said from the living room.   
"Just a minute." Harry said mindlessly as he followed Bree to the car. Louis watched them from the front door as the two talked. He had no idea who this girl was but he did recall a few years ago seeing pictures in magazines of the two of them leaving night clubs together. He assumed it was an old girlfriend of some sort.  
Harry looked panicked as he spoke to Bree and Louis had the urge to swoop in and save him but whatever was going on wasn't his problem. His heart hurt for Harry though because his problems with Eleanor weren't Harry's but here he'd just let Louis spend the night when he got locked out.   
"Why didn't you tell me before. She's three years old. I should've known a long time ago."  
"Well when I found out... I didn't know what I was going to do and to be honest, I didn't want you in my life anymore."  
"Oh what. You see pictures of me with the band and the rumours of our reunion and you think you'll come back to me so you can get my money for her."  
"Harry, that's not it at all." Bree looked down and then in her car at the sleeping little girl. "She asked me where her daddy was the other day and I was heart broken. You had a new phone number so I couldn't call you but I found out from a friend that you still lived here so I came to find you. I'm sorry to intrude but I couldn't just tell her you don't exist. She's a spitting image of you and I just couldn't." Bree had tears in her eyes so Harry pulled her close.  
"How about lunch? We can go somewhere, the three of us after I bring Louis back home." Harry dug his phone out of his pocket and handed it to her. "Put your number in and I'll call you after he's there. We can meet up anywhere."  
She nodded and did as he asked. "Thank you." Harry nodded and gave her a quick hug again before he watched her walk to the drivers side door and get in. He backed away from the car as she pulled out.   
Louis walked down the drive to where Harry was standing. "What was that about?"  
"I...." Was all Harry could manage.  
"You?" Louis looked at him, confused.  
"I'm... I'm a father." Louis' eyes got wide, almost cartoonish-looking at Harry's statement.  
"Come again?"  
"I haven't seen her in years and she basically just came over out of nowhere to tell me I have a daughter." Harry took a seat in his driveway. Pretzel-style he sat on the pavement, Louis followed suit and kneeled down to him. "Her name is Shannon." Harry had tears in his eyes but he had control over them to know they wouldn't spill over.  
"Is this... is having a daughter a bad thing?"  
"No. It's not tragic. I knew I'd have kids one day but I didn't think I'd have a child with some girl I use to sleep with."  
"Think there's a chance you and her could become a thing?"  
"I don't know. I never really had feelings for her. The sex was great but on an emotional level, I didn't love her or anything." Harry looked into Louis' eyes for the first time since he knelt down. "I'll be there for my daughter. If she wants me in her life, I'll be there for everything. I would've the entire time and I don't know if Bree believes that because of the relationship we had. If you can even call spuratic fucking a relationship." Both Harry and Louis had to giggle at that one.  
"Haz, you're a great guy and Bree will see that. I believe you. I know you'll be a great dad. And hey! She's Ashlynn's age, they could totally be best friends."  
"Aww, just like their daddies." Harry and Louis smiled at each other, their faces getting closer and closer. Harry glanced at Louis' perfect lips before looking back into his beautiful blue eyes. "I should probably bring you back home." He said breaking away and standing up, leaving Louis alone at the ground.  
"Yeah." Louis stood too. "She doesn't need more of a reason to hate me."  
Harry ran back to his house to lock the door before getting in his car to head out. He had so much on his mind he almost thought of just letting Louis drive for the time being.  
•••••  
Zayn fidgeted in his seat as Sasha answered some of her specialists questions. He always wanted to be there for Sasha but he hated hearing about her cancer. It became more real for him to be there when this was all going on. The realisation that she had less then a year with him made him want to burst into tears all the time. He wanted to do nothing but cuddle in bed with her and spend all of his time by her side but by nature, Sasha wasn't a quitter and god forbid Zayn showed any signs of giving up when she was no longer with him.   
When they got the call about getting One Direction back together, Zayn almost said no but it was Sasha who told him that the band was once his dream and she refused to ever be the reason that he didn't follow his dreams.  
"Times have changed and things are different now." Zayn told her.  
"Zayn, nothing has changed. Don't use me as your excuse to not make music again. I refuse to let me get in the way of what you love and seeing your friends and going on tour. There will always be something going on with me that'll hold you back. I'll only get worse and then I'll be gone. You have to learn now how to keep going and throw yourself into something. And if you think I'll hate you for it, I won't. I want to look down on you one day and know you never gave up. Okay, babe?" She responded. Zayn remembered word for word her speech to him and he vowed to never give up. He would be strong for and he'd make her proud everyday.   
"Sasha, I think it's time." were the words that snapped Zayn out of his trance. "I'll make the call and they'll set you up with a room. I can come by twice a week just like we do now and we can talk. You'll have your doctor there and nurses to check on you through out."  
"Wait... she's like... going to be living at the hospital."  
"If she miraculously regains strength and stamina and the cancer starts to go away, she'll be able to go home but it's fighting her so fast and so hard, she can't stay home for much longer."  
"So I have to just live in our house completely by myself now? But we bought that together!" Zayn was shouting.  
"I'll give you two a minute." Doctor Weston stepped out.  
"Zayn."  
"No, Sasha this-"  
"This wasn't part of the plan? Yeah neither was me getting brain cancer but shit happens."  
"I don't think that's the intended use of that phrase." Zayn said flatly.  
"I know and I'm sorry I never did radiation treatments, I was trying to be as much myself before something like this happened. I'm sorry that I can't just get rid of this with the snap of my fingers and I know it sucks to be in your position and just watch this happen but I can't help it anymore than you can."  
"But baby..." Zayn drifted off and lowered his head as the tears in his eyes overflowed. Last time he cried was when they found the tumor and said it was too late to do anything, that it was already spreading. But this was too much. He couldn't be in that house alone. It just remind him that soon enough it'd be permanent.   
"Zayn." This time her tone was sweet and loving. She got off the couch, walked over to Zayn, and sat in his lap. She wrapped her arms around him and let him cry.   
"I can't be without you." Zayn said in a near whisper as he continued to cry, his heart already breaking and Sasha was still with him.  
"You can see me everyday, baby."  
"Sash, it's gonna be so hard to bring myself to the hospital everyday. It's hard enough coming here and other doctors appointments with you. And don't think I don't want to be there for you, it's just so hard!" Zayn cried harder as he thought about it.  
"I know, baby. I get it. I really do." Sasha rubbed Zayn's back and let him cry. He needed to. He's let everything build over the past couple of months and needed to let out how he was feeling. "I won't ever blame you. You know that, I know you do."  
Zayn felt reassurance in her words but he still felt terrible and it didn't change the fact that he hated being away from her.  
•••••  
Louis kept an eye on his girls as the played around in the backyard. Making sure no one was getting hurt or being mean. Even though she was younger, Ashlynn liked being extremely bossy over Lucy. And now that Michelle was tiettering around, he didn't want her falling over into anything that could hurt her.   
And although he was watching over them, his mind was wondering to Harry. Not what he was up to right now with Bree, but the kiss. And most importantly, why it felt so loving and so real.   
Louis spent years in the band denoting everyone who called him gay and calling out people who called Eleanor a beard for him and Harry. Sure they had always been affectionate, especially earlier on, but it never extended that far. Despite popular belief that it did.   
It could've been innocent. Just a playful kiss that Harry didn't really even mean to give. But how could he just completely kiss Louis, right on the lips without it being something. And the way it felt like an electric charge surging through his body. It wasn't like any kiss he'd had before, that's why it confused him so much.   
Teddy's ears shot up and he began to bark when he heard a car pull into the driveway. It must've been Eleanor coming home from whatever was so important that Louis had to rush home.  
It was only a moment or two later that Eleanor made her way to the backyard. She sat on the chair opposite of Louis and looked out at the girls who were playing in their play house.   
"What were you up to?" Louis asked calmly.  
"With my lawyer."  
"Oh. You've been seeing him a lot lately."  
"Only person I can talk to right now." She said, not even looking at him. "I don't like where we've ended up, Lou but I have to do what I have to do. I can't let you drag me down when I have three little girls to care for."  
"El-"  
"No, please just let me finish. We used to be so good together and I never would've pictured me wanting to leave your side for one second but I really can't do this anymore. My lawyer is getting the paper work set up and it'll be a few more days before it's ready for us to sign."  
"And what if I don't want to sign it?"  
"I don't know, we go to court. Why wouldn't you sign it, Louis? You actually enjoy living in our shit marriage?"   
"No, but I think we can work things out."  
She finally turned to face him, surprisingly with a fairly calm expression on her face. "Louis, I've tried working things out. You wanted no part of it. You were too focused on One Direction and being away from them but you were too.... too something to even bother reaching out to them and I just never got it and I still don't. It's great, this whole reunion but I can't keep hoping for a change in you. In us."  
"You don't think this will help? Eleanor, I've been happier over the past week than I have been in the past couple of years. Doesn't that count for anything."  
"Louis... babe." Eleanor hadn't called him an affectionate name in so long, Louis forgot what it sounded like coming from her. "I'm so glad that you're happy. I know I'm cold and harsh to you. I do realise it even if you think I don't, but that's not my doing. It's being with the guys again that is making you happy. I'm your wife, I shouldn't play second fiddle to the band. I'm sorry if that sounds selfish."  
Louis got it. But if he was getting happier because of the band, who was to stay he couldn't become a better husband because of this. "How much time do we have?"  
"What? With the papers. Until the end of the week, most likely."  
"How long after that do we have? Like to sign them or whatever."  
"If we sign them right away, it'll only take as long as it takes Richard to file them and the courts to approve them. But we only have 30 days to sign the papers before their void and he'd have to type and file new documents."  
"Think a week and 30 days is enough time?" Eleanor looked at Louis for a moment before responding.  
"I mean we could try. I will if you will but you have to work with me. I really don't want this to be the end but you do understand where I'm coming from with this right?"  
Louis nodded. "I think if we both try, we can do it. We could start with a date night you know. The girls would probably love to go see one of their new uncles tonight if we wanted to try a little rekindling tonight over a nice dinner."  
Eleanor smiled and it was the first time in a while that Louis caused it. "I think that'd be nice." Eleanor stood up and gave Louis a pat on the shoulder as she passed by him. "I'll start getting ready now. You call one of the guys."  
Louis smiled and grabbed his phone to call Niall. He decided to just put this Harry incident out of his head and focus on his marriage, something more and important and a lot more real.


	5. Chapter 5

Harry stayed home alone that night, declining Taylor's invite to come out with the guys since it'd been a week or so since the last time they all got together. Wasn't hard to figure that Taylor was pretty pissed.  
"C'mon man, do you know how many girls are gonna be on you since you're reforming that shit band of yours? I mean you got pussy before but now!"  
"Taylor, I'm just gonna stay home tonight. Alright? Just need some time to relax."  
Taylor muttered some derogatory mark before hanging up the phone on him and it actually stung a little. He wasn't a fan of such harsh words in the first place but he took offense to it this time.   
But at the end of the day, Harry needed time to think of the day's events. He kissed his best mate only moments before finding out he had a 3 year old daughter. Bree wasn't kidding when she said they were near identical in every way. Spencer had dark curly hair and sparkling green eyes. Her little teeth were just as straight as Harry's were at that age, but that was something that could change. She wasn't shy either. After Spencer had woken up from her nap, she was extremely talkative for such a little girl. Immediately growing attached to Harry as if she just knew he belonged to her. With every smile she flashed, Harry could feel her wrapping around his finger already. Bree didn't mind one bit and was happy that it wasn't too late after all.   
They planned to meet up again and if all went all, Harry would be able to start having Spencer come over on her own.   
Bree and Harry actually established tonight that there would probably be no "Barry" or whatever the media may create up for them. Bree was happy with just Spencer and if she didn't want anything emotional with Harry before and now after seeing how great he was with their daughter, then it probably wouldn't happen and Harry was fine with that. He liked Bree and hoped they could be friends and great parents together but he didn't like her that way and he knew he wouldn't. He was a pretty good judge of how he felt about people fairly early into knowing them and it wasn't any different with her.   
•••••  
Niall had finally gotten the girls to calm down with the help of Darian. Lucy and Ashlynn seemed to be full of energy despite it getting closer to their bedtime. That's when he realised cake and ice cream for dessert may not have been the best idea.   
"How about a movie girls?" Niall called out as Darian took Michelle off to bed. Niall liked the way she looked with a baby in her arms and felt a twinge of excitement for when it'd one day be their own she held.   
"YES!" Both girls yelled at once. Niall's hand flew to his mouth, a finger covering his lips letting the girls know to be quiet. He really didn't want to wake Michelle.   
"We have some Disney DVDs under the cabinet. How about you check those out girls?" The girls ran to the cabinet and rummaged through until settling for Peter Pan. "Fitting" Niall thought as he put the DVD in. They really were Louis' kids.   
Lucy cuddled up to Niall on the sofa as they got settled in. Ashlynn took a liking to Darian and opted to lay with her on the love seat during the movie. It was cute having a little family moment even if it wasn't there kids.   
By the time the movie was over, both girls were completely asleep. So much so, neither Niall or Darian wanted to move.   
"What time were they coming back for their kiddos?" Darian asked as she played with Ashlynn's hair.  
"Don't know." Niall shrugged and readjusted the blanket around him and Lucy. Like clock-work his phone lit up with a text from Louis.  
Lost track of time a bit. Are the girls asleep? -Louis  
Yep. Michelle is in her carry-away crib in the spare room and the two older girls are out on the couch with us. -Niall  
Could they just stay there for the night then? I don't wanna wake them. Especially not Ashlynn, she has trouble getting back to bed when she's woken. We'll get them in the morning. -Louis  
Yeah, mate. Totally fine with us. Text me tomorrow when you're coming to pick up the kiddos. Night -Niall  
Night, Niall. Thanks so much man! -Louis  
"Think we could just move gently and let them sleep out here?" Darian asked.  
"We could grab our old sleeping bags or something and camp on the floor." Niall added.  
"We could share one." Darian said with a cheeky grin.  
"You dirty little-"  
"Nialler, no foul words in front of the children!" Darian said playfully. "I'll go get them baby." She kissed him quickly as she made her way to the back storage room by the garage.   
After a few minutes, he heard the low sound of someone talking in a another room again just as he had woken up to the other day. The clock read 12:34am which meant it was only 7:34pm in Ontario, so Darian was probably just talking to her mum again. But what didn't make sense to him now was what he didn't realise the other day. It was only about 9 in the morning when he was woken up to her talking on the phone. That would've made it 4 in the morning over there. Darian had little siblings who lived at home still and calling at 4am would not have gone over well. Niall grew suspicious but didn't let it phase him too much. It wasn't a pressing issue right now.  
Twenty or so minutes later, Darian came back with the jumbo sleeping bag that both her and Niall could fit into comfortably.  
"On the phone again?" Niall asked calmly in a whisper as he slowly got up and helped her with the bag.  
"Yep." She said blankly.  
"Mum?" This time she just nodded, fussing over one corner of the sleeping bag.  
"Was she mad at you for calling so early in the morning the other day?"  
"What?" Darian gave him a confused look before realising. "Oh that... no she's. I uh.. yeah. She wasn't too happy about that. I just forget sometimes." Darian got under the sleeping bag quickly and turned on her side. "Get under here and cuddle with me, babe."  
Niall felt slightly uneasy, feeling as though he was being lied to. But what would their relationship be if he didn't trust her. She's never given him a reason not to do anything but. So just as she asked, Niall got in the sleeping bag and cuddled her. Holding her close to him and falling asleep just like that. Not another thought of doubt crossing his mind.  
•••••  
Louis and Eleanor were silent during the car ride over to Niall's. Almost as though things last night went farther than either of them intended and now they had to deal with it.   
Dinner was good, they did more than the mindless small talk they'd been doing for a while now and they actually learned some new things about one another. But it wasn't romantic, it was just friendly. Louis didn't want Eleanor to be just his friend though. He didn't have much time to prove that they loved each other and if "friendly dinners" weren't cutting it for him, they wouldn't for her.   
After that they went out for a walk around town, taking in different things around them that Eleanor was too busy to see and Louis to depressed. They held hands loosely and let some paps snap a few romantic shots of them looking happy. Something the press hadn't had a whiff of in a while.   
But after that and after a car ride home where Louis and Eleanor blasted some of their old favourite songs the entire way, they popped open a few too many bottles of wine from the cellar and let it get to them.   
It'd been a while since Louis had done anything more than a casual wank in the shower when he was feeling exceptionally horny so when Eleanor started to a rather sexy strip tease for him, he could feel himself growing hard fairly quickly. Eleanor was still just as gorgeous as she was the day he met her and she still had the ability to turn him on just as quickly.   
She grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and pulled him along to the bedroom. Eleanor pushed him down on the bed and climbed on top of him. Attacking his shirt and pants, making quick action with the buttons and belt, she tore them off and threw them out of the way without a second thought. It only took a few more minutes before she mounted him and did various other things they hadn't since before Michelle was born. Yes, it really had been that long.  
But when they woke up, the satisfying feeling they had gone to bed with was no longer there. Instead it was replaced with awkward silences and a sense of almost shame. They'd taken advantage of a "getting to re-know you" date and made it a not so casual fuck session.   
Eleanor decided to make Louis a cup of tea though before they left and she even accepted his kiss when she handed it to her. They couldn't exactly talk to one another right now but at least it wasn't out of hate.  
"The girls seemed to have a good night. We played different games and watched some fun movies. And we may have given them a lot of extra sugar they didn't need but I mean that's my job as an uncle, is it not!" Niall said as the girls were being piled into Louis' escalade.   
"Uncle Ni, no!" Lucy was in tears as Eleanor placed her in her booster seat.   
"Don't cry, darling!" Niall said sympathetically. "You'll probably see me later this week. And I can call you later tonight to say goodnight before you go to bed. How about that?" Lucy nodded and Eleanor stepped aside so Niall could give her a hug goodbye. He wiped away her little tears and waved to her as Eleanor shut the door.   
"That was sweet of you, Ni. She really took a liking to you!" Eleanor said with a smile.   
"Yeah, she's a cutie. I don't mind." Niall smiled and continued to wave because Lucy kept waving. "And I quite enjoy being someones favourite if I'm being honest."  
Eleanor laughed. "Of course!" She got back in the passenger seat and said goodbye before Louis drove off.  
"So you girls had a good time?" Louis asked to the back seat. Ashlynn and Lucy both nodded excitedly. "Good. That's good and it seems you didn't make uncle Ni pull too much of his hair out."   
Louis turned on the radio for the rest of the ride home. Background music for a really old One Direction song began to play, one he himself hadn't heard in quite a while.   
"Here's a throwback for you, Best Song Ever by One Direction. Remember these guys? I bet you do! Well Simon Cowell himself has officially confirmed the reunion of 1D after going on hiatus over 10 years ago. He said to keep your eyes and ears out for new music, new interviews, and new tours coming up very soon as they guys take the studio and the world by storm once again. Here ya go guys, Best Song Ever."  
"Daddy!" Lucy called out, knowing the song right away. Louis smiled and could see Eleanor smiling out of the corner of his eye. It was nice that the band was getting this much buzz over just the announcement. Paps, radio stations, magazines, and tv corps were taking their interest in the boy band again for what they were musically as opposed to the figures they've become since their break. Louis didn't know he'd miss the feeling of being in the limelight as much as he did and he knew it wasn't just the limelight. It was the fans and the touring and the making music with his best friends that he missed the most and he was happy that there were people just as excited as him about this reunion.   
•••••  
Zayn felt himself crumbling as he woke up to Sasha being gone. Yesterday was an emotional day as she checked into the hospital, both of them knowing that unless things took a drastic turn for the better, she'd be there for the remainder of her life. Zayn broke down the second they got her changed and put in that bed. They made her take off her beanie and you could see just how much hair she'd lost. Her long, full brown hair was nearly gone, only small patches remained. A week ago you couldn't even tell and now anyone who looked at her would've known. They asked her if she'd be okay with cutting the rest off and she nodded, not really minding at this point whether or not she had hair. But Zayn minded. He always minded. He didn't want her here in a place that wasn't their house where he could take care of her. But he knew he couldn't take care of her anymore. They were well past that point and it made him sick. He wasn't anywhere near ready to say goodbye to the love of his life. He stayed with her until 2 in the morning when she was falling asleep and told him to go him and get some sleep himself. Still looking out for Zayn as she lay in a hospital bed, dying.   
It wasn't an easy car ride. He blasted loud music so he could just scream at the top of lungs like he wanted to. The traffic was light and the roads were fairly empty for his entire ride home. And that was good because his driving sucked due to his blurred vision and aggressive hands.   
He hated everything that was going on and as he walked into the lonely house that wouldn't be his and Sasha's anymore, he slammed every door, kicked every piece of furniture, and threw everything in sight. Not caring what he destroyed. His life was destroyed and it was only a matter of time that he'd have to pretend that he was entirely fine for the world as everything he loved crumbled away to nothing and it wasn't fair. Life wasn't fucking fair but Zayn didn't want any of it. He wanted Sasha to be healthy again. He wanted to do everything they'd written down on the bucket list. He wanted to have babies with her and raise a family and grow old together. He needed nothing more than that and he wasn't ever going to get it.   
Zayn cried himself to sleep that night and that resulted into the soar throat he woke up with. He checked his phone and saw some messages from the guys about radio buzz that the newly announced One Direction reunion was getting and how fans were going completely nuts about it. But he ignored them entirely when he saw Sasha texted him.  
I love you and I know this is hard for you. Do yourself a favour and don't come by today. It hit me hard this morning when I woke up and I'm quite sick right now. It's not good for you to be around and I know by saying that I'm sick you automatically want to come to my rescue but you need to save yourself right now. Seeing you hurting will only make me hurt so please, if you need me text me. I'll have my phone glued to my side waiting for whatever you want to send. I'll let you know when you can come by. I love you so so so much baby. I really do. Forever. -Sasha xxxx  
Zayn teared up again and as his tears turned to sobs his throat burned. He wanted to go the kitchen and make some tea but he didn't want to get out of bed. He wanted someone to be with him right now and help him but nothing but Sasha could truly do that.   
He decided to make the grown up decision to get out of bed and make himself some tea and he dialed Liam. If Liam heard him right now he'd be here in a heart beat and be strong for Zayn. Liam was always that person for Zayn when they were younger. If Zayn couldn't be strong for a while, Liam would be right there to be strong for him. And although the situation was out of both of their control, at least he'd have someone to lean on.   
The phone only rang twice before Liam sing-songed a hello.   
"Can you come over? I need you right now." And that was all Zayn had to say.   
"I'm on my way." Liam replied before hanging up. He knew by the time his phone left his hand that Liam was already in the car, on his way to help how ever he could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not exactly sure how many chapters this is going to be but I know every detail of this story and what is going to happen in it. I'm just not sure how many chapters it'll take to get there just yet but as soon as I have a rough estimate, I can fill it in.  
> Also, I appreciate everyone who has read this so far and is continuing to read it. I know since I've posted it, I've been updating daily but with school and work and stuff I think I'm going to choose my sole updating day as either Monday, Tuesday, or Wednesday. Not sure yet but I'll let you know probably at the end of next chapter!   
> Lastly, if you have any questions about updates or comments or suggestions you can leave them obviously on the story as feedback because I'd love to hear it or you could get ahold of me via twitter which is @ronnieBooBear or my tumbr burningitwas-red.tumblr.com I follow back and reply and all that good stuff because I'm a very boring person who isn't too good to do that! Haha :) x


	6. Chapter 6

Liam sped on over to Zayn's house and let himself in when he got there.   
"Zayn?" He called out to the seemingly empty house. All the lights were out and there wasn't any sounds being made.   
"In here." Zayn called. Liam wasn't exactly sure where the hall he was walking down was taking him, he'd never been in this house before. When Liam walked in to what he assumed was Zayn and Sasha's bedroom, he found a mess of Zayn laying under the covers.   
"What's wrong?" genuine concern coming from Liam. As he got closer he could see visible tear stains on Zayn's puffy cheeks and red eyes. "Zayn, are you alright?" Liam sat down on the bed beside Zayn.  
Zayn shook his head and slightly sat up.   
"Where's Sasha? Is everything okay?" Zayn's eyes began to prick with tears again at her name.   
"No..." Zayn fought back the tears to talk to Liam. "She's uh... she's in the hospital. We didn't tell any of you but not too long ago they found a brain tumor way too late and it'd already started spreading. They gave her less than a year to live." A few tears rolled down Zayn's cheeks. "They put her in the hospital permanently yesterday and I really want to see her but she doesn't think that'd be a good idea because of how torn up I am. But... but how could I not." This time Zayn sobbed and lunged for Liam who completely took him in his arms.   
"Zayn..." Liam had no idea anything could be this bad and Zayn certainly didn't deserve it. He'd just married her and they were in love. They wanted kids and planned for forever, right? What if this was Sofia? Liam couldn't handle that! He held Zayn as he shook and cried and wished that he could change this for him.   
"They don't think she'll get better. She's too weak now for any therapy or anything else they could do." Zayn managed to say before breaking down again. "I..I was able to forget, ya know? Because she was here and she could smile and laugh and be with me. But now she's there and I just know..." Zayn chocked on a sob and stopped talking.  
Liam didn't know how to respond so he just kept holding him. He was in complete shock that this was even happening, he didn't know how to help. He felt completely useless to the situation despite wanting to do everything he could to get Zayn through this; make Sasha better.  
•••••  
Bree had dropped Spencer off for the day with Harry to see how he could do without her being around. He felt pretty confident in his abilities with children seeing as how much time he'd spent with Lux when she was this age and she turned out just fine.   
Spencer liked being with Harry which was good. She wasn't shy around him like he thought she might've been. It was if she could just tell that he was daddy. Maybe it was because right away, he knew he loved her. That was his little girl and he always would no matter what circumstances he was under. Luckily, Bree realised it too that Harry wasn't some evil ass who wouldn't want his child.   
It was nearly time for lunch when Harry rummaged through the fridge and cabinets to find he had next to nothing to eat.   
"Should we shopping, Spence?" Spencer nodded her head and made her way to Harry.   
"Daddy, up!" Harry's heart melted at her calling him daddy. So she really did know who he was. Bree probably told her but it still felt good to know that she wasn't just this naturally attached to a stranger. Harry picked her up, grabbed his keys, and headed for the door.   
He picked up a car seat for Spencer the other day when he was out doing various things just so he was prepared for whenever she'd ride with him. Guess that was a good thing already.  
Harry liked going into town and shopping at various little corner market stores. His friends poked fun at him and his "hipster" side kicking in but he just thought they had the best groceries.   
"Ready, baby girl?" Harry asked, getting Spencer out of her car seat and carrying her along as they walked on the sidewalk. Photographers quickly recognized him and began snapping away.   
"Who's the child, Harry?" "Styles, can you tell us who this us?" and the disgusting one "Did you switch from cougars to kittens, Harry!" He ignored them all and let them think what they wanted. He didn't want to alarm Bree just yet that they'd all be under the media's microscope so they could guess away until he had the chance to ask her how she felt about the world knowing.  
Harry couldn't help but think it was adorable as Spencer waved on to the various papz. But this was her first time out and they didn't know who she was. As they became aware, there would be more and they'd get louder and probably more terrifying to a 3 year old. He knew it happened to Lux, and she wasn't even his actual child.  
•••••  
Zayn and Liam made their way to the living room and were sipping on tea that Liam had made them. Zayn had calmed down quite a bit and was able to talk about Sasha without breaking down with each word.   
"You don't have to answer this if you don't want, I know you probably can't right now but uh.. you aren't gonna... end it for yourself when she goes, are you?" Liam said with concern.   
Zayn looked down at his cup before looking back at Liam. "I thought about it. I'm not going to lie and I'll continue to think about it but I know I won't. She won't want me to and that'll hopefully be enough to stop me. Will I ever date again, marry again? No. Probably not. She was the one for me and I'm certain I won't find anyone who makes me feel the way she does." Liam nodded in response. "I'm just worried about our future when this happens. I'm completely torn up now and she's still alive. I don't know how I'm going to function when she's actually gone. What if the band has to break again?"  
"Do you think we'd be mad or something? Because we wouldn't. At all! We'd be there for you and we wouldn't let what happen last time happen again too." Liam sounded so reassuring but management would be concerned. They were all supposed to stay so close during the last break and that turned into ten years of silence. But management could fuck themselves for all Liam was concerned. This was way more serious then making sure One Direction makes a comeback. "We're here for you, Zayn. And if you need help telling the others or management or Simon, if you want to do that, I'll be here for you."  
•••••  
Lottie was at her flat not too far away from where Louis and Eleanor lived so she volunteered to have a night with her nieces so the two "love birds" as she put it could get some time alone. Louis was close with her sister, and know that she was older he could tell her more. Lottie knew well and good the trouble he was having with his wife but she also knew that they were trying to rekindle their love, hence her joke.   
They decided to spend a night in. Order some pizza, rent some movies, and talk.   
"What did you think of the other night?" Eleanor asked bluntly as they waited near the entryway for the pizza guy to come.   
"The date or the.... the after."   
"Louis, your 32 years old. I think you can say sex." Eleanor joked.  
"Want me to be honest?" Louis was blunt back.  
"Spare my feelings why don't ya. I know it's been a while since we've gone at it but I didn't realise it was bad." Eleanor rolled her eyes but she wasn't cold about it.   
"No, it was great but it was just different. Ya know? I mean it was really good, I'm a guy even when it's not good it's still pretty damn good. It was almost awkward though because it didn't really mean anything. You're my wife, it should mean something."  
"Guess I can't be offended by that then." She replied. "I get that though. I think we kinda did it for the sake of doing it. Dinner was great though but I think we may have gone a little too fast with the rest. I surprisingly enough do want things to work out for us, Lou. I'm in my early thirties, have three kids, and I don't exactly have much game left."  
Louis rolled his eyes and laughed. "I was there last night, you have plenty of game left." They both laughed at that. "Are we fooling ourselves, El? Can we really do this?"  
"Do what?"  
"Save our marriage? I mean yeah, we work well together when things are good but when they aren't, I drag you down or you piss me off by going cold. Marriage is for better or worse and we can't always handle the worse."   
"Louis, I-"  
"No, hold on. I don't want you to think I'm giving up on us but what if we're only capable of being friends. What if someone else is out there for us and we're just holding one another back trying to make this work."  
Eleanor was silent as she thought about it. Louis could physically see the wheels cranking in her mind, thoughts circling around about what he'd just said. "I get it. I do and I don't think you're entirely wrong but at the same time, that was one date. Do we really just call it all off now because of one awkward encounter when we have a month ahead of us to keep trying?"  
"Do you think it's possible for the two of us to be more than just friends? Because I can honestly say I love you and that I don't regret our lives together one bit but what if that love is only so deep. On my part and yours."  
"I think we just need to try. We can't fall madly in love with each other again after just one night. It's worth it to me if it is to."  
Louis nodded slowly. "It's worth it." He said even though his heart and mind were agreeing on something completely different. But as soon as the words came out, he couldn't take them back. Eleanor was smiling ear to ear and it only showed how much she cared, how much she wanted this. But Louis had his doubts that he knew would shine through as time went on and she needed him to get serious. He really felt like he wasn't in love anymore. He loved El but he wasn't in love with her.  
•••••  
Days passed and it was time for the boys to sit down with management and get some dates in line. Zayn wanted nothing more than to stay home or go see Sasha, he didn't want to be around people right now. He felt like he was getting better but he still feared that he could break down at any moment and he worried about what he was missing when he wasn't with her. At least if he was there he'd know, even if he didn't necessarily want to.  
Louis and Eleanor had been going more places together with the girls and with everything they did, Louis was still certain of how he felt towards her. Eleanor was happier than ever and even more loving but Louis could only pretend to be genuine for so long. Harry could tell something was up the other day when he stopped by for lunch and Eleanor gave Louis a big kiss before leaving to shop. Louis told Harry that they were trying to work things out and he swore he saw Harry's face drop a little. "Oh alright" was his only response before changing the subject.   
Harry still hadn't told the others about Spencer. The only one who knew besides Bree was his parents and Gemma. It's safe to say Anne wasn't too thrilled that he had a child with a woman he didn't intend to marry but she it only took 5 minutes of Harry carrying on about how adorable his little girl was for her to go into Grandma mode.   
Niall noticed more and more that Darian was taking random calls at different times of the day but each time she'd still just say it was different members of her family. She never talked to them this much and it wasn't adding up but he didn't confront her about it yet. It'd only been a few days and he didn't want her to think he was insecure or accusatory towards her.  
Liam worried about Zayn everyday and wondered if the rest of his band mates were keeping big things from one another. They had to trust each other to make things work as a band and he knew they all had secrets they were hiding, they had to. Things weren't this easy after ten years. It just wasn't possible.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I think what I'm going to do is update twice a week. Monday's and Thursday's. So there may or not be a chapter posted tomorrow since it'll be Thursday. I picked those days so it gives me enough time to write good chapters for y'all and review them. Plus it'll make it so I don't have to race to the computer all the time and make sure I post a chapter everyday.   
> I hope everyone who is reading is enjoying. Sorry that this chapter was kind of a filler and that it was so short. Definitely going to be picking up quite soon with some intense things, just wait!


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm terrible!!!! I completely skipped last week and if I actually have any dedicated readers out there who were really looking forward to the next chapter, I'm sooooo sorry! I really am. I was sick all last week and barely wanted to be alive so writing was not in my forte but I promise that you'll get the regular Monday and Thursday updates.  
> My goal is to have them posted on those days no later than 8pm :)

Louis woke to a note from Eleanor saying that she'd taken the girls out for a mommy-daughter day of nails and shopping and lunch. She also told him to enjoy himself with the guys today.   
After the meeting with management yesterday, Liam suggested the 5 of them got together today and have a big heart to heart and they all agreed. Niall offered up his place since Darain would be at work all day.   
Louis got ready and had a cup of tea before heading out. His head filled with everything he wanted to say but was too scared to let come out. He used to trust these guys with every single one of his secrets... well all but one but that was something no one knew about him.   
He pulled into Niall's house and noticed Harry's Range Rover. His heart skipped a beat as thoughts of Harry filled his head. Slamming his door, he forced himself to forget. This wasn't the time.  
"Hey, mate!" Niall greeted him at the door. The others were all in his living room, almost awkwardly sitting as if they didn't want to be there.   
Harry saw Louis and gave him a small smile and patted the seat next to him, signalling Louis to come sit next to him. Doing as he said, he scooted close to his friend for comfort. He liked Harry's comfort just as he always had.  
"Guys... I just..." Liam started and it wasn't coming easy to him. Not as easy as he'd thought it would. "Stuff has been going on with all of us, like as individuals, since our break and we're not all being honest with one another. Life is as perfect as we're leading on and if we want to be successful we have to be as open as we once were with one another. We worked so well when we were younger because we told each other everything and we were always there for each other. That's not going to work if we're hiding behind our problems."   
Louis, Harry, and Zayn each grew more tense and it was visible. Louis moved even closer to Harry, nearly on his lap now and Harry just tightened his grip around Louis' shoulders. If they were alone, Louis would've nuzzled himself into a nook in Harry and just stayed there until he felt like coming out. There'd been many nights in the past where that'd happened and no matter how hard he tried, Louis never felt quite as safe as he did when he'd do that.   
"Who should we start with then, Li?" Niall asked as he munched on the chips he'd set out.   
Liam gave a look at all of them quickly but stopped at Zayn who shook his head. Liam made his way back to Louis, who he knew was shying away. Louis looked up at Harry for help.  
"I'll start." Harry let out. He sat up a little bet and Louis fell even more into his side, but it was okay. He liked it that way. "So umm... I haven't really had any serious relationships with anyone since the band broke.. er.. took our break. But a few years ago I was sort of friends with benefits with this girl called Bree. She was a decent enough friend at the time but we kinda just liked sleeping with one another, ya know? Not anything serious. It kinda just ended between us and it wasn't much of a loss. But umm, not too long ago she introduced to Spencer... our daughter."   
The boys just stared at Harry, waiting for more.   
"I really don't know what else to say. She's been letting me see her and having alone time so we get to know each other. She's taken to me quickly though and Bree's happy about that."  
"How old is she?" Liam asked.  
"She's almost four. March, she'll be four."   
"Does she look like ya at all?" Niall was the next to ask.   
Harry smiled. "Curly and green eyes just like her daddy."  
"Well that's great, Harry. We're happy for you mate and we can't wait to meet your little girl." All the guys smiled back at Harry and it felt good to let his best friends know that he was a father. And despite the situation, he was proud to be a dad.   
Harry nudged Louis slightly. "You?" He said quietly.  
"Haz... I can't." Louis could actually feel tears. Maybe now because he knew it was his fault that his marriage wasn't working. Eleanor was giving her all and falling for him again.   
"But aren't you working on things?"   
"Hey! No secrets over there. This is a group activity. I don't mean to be rude but if you got something to say, share it with us!" Liam interjected but Harry still stared deep into Louis' eyes knowing something wasn't right. "Louis do you want to go next?"   
"I'm here for you, babe." Harry said as he grabbed Louis' hand. Louis tried to smile back at his best friend, his Harry but it was difficult to smile when he was so close to losing it.  
"Eleanor and I aren't doing too good guys. Not nearly as good as I've been trying to make it seem. We were actually not too far from ending it when I somehow managed to convince her to stay and try with me but now that we've both begun to try... I realise now that this isn't what I want." Louis paused to gather himself. He looked at Liam and he could tell he wanted the rest. "I love Eleanor, I do and I always have but... I just don't love her like that. I've always tried to convince myself I did and at one point, maybe but after the break I just, it hit me that it wasn't right and I just fell into such a depression because I tried to come to terms with it but I was disgusted with myself." A tear rolled down Louis' cheek and Harry wiped it away for him.   
"Wait... so are you saying that you're..." Niall stopped himself, not sure if this was leading to where it is. But Louis began to nod almost instantly.  
"Am I gay? Well I'm almost certain I don't like girls. I hope it's not a problem." Louis tried to make a joke but he knew it wasn't all that funny.   
"Louis, we love you no matter what. You know that! Gay, straight, bi, even asexual; which you dirty minded sure are not. You're still our Louis." Liam got up and gave Louis a hug.   
"And no offense Lou, but you aren't hard to figure out." Niall added.   
"Yeah, I know. You've all probably known before I did. I spent so much time denying that when I realised.... it just made me sick to even look at myself. I really hated myself, if I didn't have the girls..." The room grew serious again and Louis looked at his wrists and fidgeted with them. "It was just a really hard time for me."   
"Louis... did you ever... like... cut yourself?" Harry asked.   
Louis began to nod and he could feel Harry tense up next to him. "It was brief. I stopped eating for a while too. That lasted a lot longer than the cutting. I didn't like having to wear long sleeves all the time to cover it up and I don't really wear bracelets. I didn't want my girls seeing the scars. I really didn't want Eleanor seeing them either. So I just stopped eating. I didn't like do the whole anorexic thing though. I just drank a lot of water and have a granola bar or something for my days worth of food. If we went out at all with the girls to try and make us look like a semi-happy family, I'd eat whatever was small."   
"I wish I'd known, Lou." Harry gave him a hug this time and Louis held on tight back.   
"We all wish we'd known. It's not fair that you had to go through that all alone." Niall said.  
"When I sort of came to terms with it, I changed my mind again and convinced Eleanor to give our marriage a try again. She's falling again and it fucking sucks because I can see her being her old self again and she can tell that I'm happy again, and I am, but I don't love her like I used to. And when she finds out I wasted her time just to tell her I'm gay... that'll be a fun time in court."  
"I think if she knows the full story, she won't be mad. If she knows how you've felt and how you tried to save your marriage and make her happy but you were basically full of just so much self-hatred, she'll understand. And if she does't, you have us."   
Harry had his arm around Louis' waist and pulled him close. Their legs were touching and Louis felt calm despite the craziness surrounding him.   
"Is it someone elses turn?" Louis asked.   
Liam looked to Zayn who slightly sat up despite the devastated look on his face.   
"Sasha has cancer." Zayn said straight out. "And she's in the hospital where she'll spend the next couple of... how ever long until she's gone." Zayn was so cold and upfront. Not at all the way he'd been with Liam just the other day.   
"Zayn... I'm so sorry for you, man. We really had no idea. She seemed so healthy last time we saw her." Niall said. Harry and Louis both nodded.   
"It happened quick. Her diagnosis, the spreading. She didn't want treatment because she wanted to be herself while she still had time left. I spent a lot of time ignoring it but now that I'm at our house by myself, it's kinda hit me. Ya know?" Liam was impressed with how well he was holding himself together. Zayn completely broke down last time, but maybe knowing he had the support of his best mates kept the tears in. "But that's basically it. If that hadn't happened, I'd be golden right now but my world is kind of destroyed over this. But I made a promise to her to keep going when she was gone and I know you guys will help me and hopefully deal with me on those days I don't want to get out of bed or do anything. And I'm going to apologise in advance for the absolute ass I'm going to be when the time comes."   
"You don't need to apologise for that, Zayn. If you don't act out at all, I'd honestly be concerned." Niall said. Zayn nodded and joined in with Harry and Louis in looking back and forth between Niall and Liam.  
"So what are you two hiding?" Harry asked.   
"Me? Well nothing. And I'm being completely honest. If something was up I'd tell you guys. Things are good with me right now so I'm here to be strong for you guys when you need me."   
"Same. The only reason I did this is because I could tell something was up with the three of you. Maybe not as much Harry but definitely Zayn and Louis. I wanted you to know it was safe to come to us just as it was before. And if anything happens with Niall or me, we know we can come to you too. We're in this together and ten years hasn't changed that."   
"Thanks for being excepting, lads. Really, I didn't think you'd mind me being gay but just the reassurance of you guys being okay with it is good. At least some people are."  
"More than some people are gonna be okay with it, Louis. And I know you're worried about telling Eleanor but I think if you calmly sit down with her and just be honest and explain everything, it'll be okay. She's not a bad person but seeing you hurt and depressed for so long obviously took a toll on her. Knowing why can probably fix some unresolved issues that a few dates can't fix." Liam said.   
"I agree." Harry said, leaning in close to Louis. Louis didn't think Harry realised how much these actions were confusing him though. He loved them but he wished he knew what they meant. He wished he knew what everything meant.   
"So are we all set to hit the recording studio this weekend, lads? First session in quite a while!" Niall cheered excitedly.  
"Hell yeah! Gonna get some ace songs that our girls are gonna love." All the boys smiled. Their girls. Their wonderful fans that they'd left hanging for so long. Hopefully the lived up to the hype they were already facing post-reunion announcement.   
•••••  
When Zayn got to the hospital after his day with the guys, Sasha was asleep. He knew she was in a lot of discomfort but she looked at peace right now. In that moment he knew more than ever that he had to come to terms with what was going on and be the strong one. She was too weak to be strong and as her husband, as the healthy one, as the one who'd have to keep her memory alive, he had to be the strong one.   
•••••  
Harry went to Bree's after leaving Niall's house. On the car ride he thought about everything he'd heard today but his mind kept going back to Louis. After all this time spent trying to convince the world that he was straight, Louis ended up actually being gay and you know what? That was okay and Harry knew a lot of other people would feel the exact same way. Being gay wouldn't change how wonderful and caring and talented Louis was. So what if he preferred a dick to a vagina? Sue him for being a little different. He was still a human being just like everyone else.  
It wasn't until Harry was nearly at Bree's that he'd realised how confusing his actions lately may have been for someone who'd been struggling so long with his sexuality. Harry'd kissed him for fucks sake! He wanted to drive into a tree at the thought of his foolish decisions, because what if Louis actually did like Harry. Sure it'd always been a rumour amongst the fans but what if it were true? Harry wasn't sure how to feel about even the possibility of it. Louis was his best friend in the entire world. Granted he'd kissed him not too long ago and they cuddled all the time and were rather intimate in the confines of their flat or other private places through out their friendship, but Harry had always thought of them as just being close. His mum wondered about it and even asked him if there was something more going on but just like everyone before him who'd asked, he simply said they were just close.   
Did all those cuddle sessions and close nights make him gay? Every now and then in the past he had his thoughts about Louis but they were all dismissed by whatever girl he was thinking of at the time. Or at least trying to think of.   
When Harry was a lot younger he'd thought he was bisexual because he was convinced he had this thing for one of his openly gay classmates. But when that guy got a boyfriend and their flirtationship ended, Harry hadn't really ever thought of another guy in a "more than friends" sort of way. Well until Louis that is, but he was able to push back those feelings for years when they went without speaking.   
He contemplated bring it up and seeing if it was just him. He wanted to talk to the others and see if they thought that he was being a little too hands on but maybe it really was just him. He didn't want to make things weird because how awful would Louis feel if he came out in confidence and Harry comes along and makes a big deal about what his intentions are. He knew he couldn't do that to Louis now but if things continued and Harry kept feeling the way he does, he knew he'd have to bring it up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The twitter is @ronnieBooBear and the tumblr is burningitwas-read.tumblr.com I'm always happy to answer questions.... or just talk.... cause I get lonely sometimes. Haha I have no life! But seriously, ask anything you want, leave ideas for this fanfic. I want to hear y'alls predictions and what not!  
> Also, leaving feedback, even just small comments about what you did/didn't like in a certain part really helps me write better and it just makes me feel more motivated to write even better chapters! Thank you :) xx


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Urgggghhhh I'm terrible. Okay, I'm officially gonna take back what I said about updating every Monday and Thursday. It's really difficult and with school and work I haven't been able to update and with every Monday and Thursday that pass since I've updated, I feel terrible.   
> My new goal is to simply update once a week for y'all.   
> I have this big graduation project that I've been prepping for and as soon as that's over with on November 6th, I'll probably be able to update on a regular basis again. :)

Louis was telling Eleanor tonight. He was nervous but he took his friends words to heart. If she truly care about him, she'd understand and she'd realise just how hard it was for him to do this. He never wanted to feel like he was failing her and that's why he hid his sexuality for so long.   
The girls were visiting with Eleanor's mum tonight, she'd come by to pick them up early while Eleanor was out. Louis could feel himself shaking when he heard Eleanor's car door shut in the driveway. But he had to do this.  
"Hey, babe!" Eleanor said when Louis came to greet her at the door. She went in for a kiss but Louis just gave her a hug instead. "Everything alright?" she asked, sensing his mood.  
"Um... no not really. I think we need to talk." Louis walked to the couch and Eleanor followed behind.   
"Louis, what's going on. I thought-"  
"Just listen for a second. Things were getting better, Eleanor I love you dearly but I love you enough to be honest with you. And this is really difficult to say but... I'm gay." Eleanor stared back at him silently with big eyes. "I've known for a while but I pushed it all away because I didn't think it was right. It made me sick and it affected the way I lived. It affected our relationship and I just wanted to tell you but I was afraid of what you'd do."  
"Afraid? Of me? Louis if I'd known.. I thought you were just being a lazy bum because of the band. This is a big deal. You were in a depression over your sexuality and that's not okay. You should be comfortable with yourself, always. That's what we teach our girls, darling."  
"I know and I wanted to say something, everyday but you hated me. I didn't know-"  
"It's fine, Lou. It's in the past and I don't hate you... at all. I mean obviously this kinda puts an end to figuring out where we stand as husband and wife but you've got me for life as a friend. Thank you for being honest before it got to far again."  
Louis sighed with relief and couldn't believe how easy this was. He for sure thought things would be thrown and obscenities would be said but she was full of understanding. "I feel for our girls though." Louis let out. "I know what it's like coming from a broken family and I never wanted that for them."  
"But we're not broken. Even if we go off and find someone else to spend our lives with, we'll always have each other and the girls will actually be able to see their parents happy when we're around one another. This didn't break us, you're honesty made us stronger. And even if we split up weekends and holidays and vacations, the girls will still have to great parents."  
"I never thought of it that way."   
"That's what I'm here for. To get the negatives out of your head. No negatives anymore. This is a good thing. We're only going to take steps forward."   
Louis smiled at Eleanor and gave her a tight hug. She truly was the greatest. Her husband just came out to her after years of arguments and hatred and she was being the most understanding person in the world. He wasn't sure what the future was going to hold but at least now he looked forward to it.  
•••••  
Harry was holding Spencer close as they both laid asleep on his sofa. He had a nice long day of shopping with her to buy things for her new room that he was decorating. Him and Bree were working out a more set schedule of who got Spencer at what times instead of just sending a text to see who she should be with. And instead of just using the spare room for her, he decided it was the right time to give her a proper room.  
And of course since he was seen out in public with the same little girl again, people may catch on. It was his worry that people were going to hound him and his worries were met when he went about town, trying to take care of his business.   
But Spencer still didn't mind. She waved to the hoards of people around them. Smiling and blowing little kisses as if she was born to handle the masses. Harry couldn't help but find it adorable. But despite that, it was still a relief when he finished all his shopping and was able to head home.   
Spencer napped in Harry's room while he began painting the walls of the now old spare room and assembling various furniture pieces. For a three year old, Harry was awfully surprised at how his daughter knew exactly what she wanted for her room. When they got to the kids section of the furniture store, she immediately fell in love with the butterfly room set and wanted nothing to do with any of the other displays. So Harry got all the different pieces and paint sets to make her room up exactly the way she wanted. Purple and yellow walls with little butterfly decals. A bed spread of matching polka dots. A white dresser, bed, and shelf unit. Plus a miniature desk that went right in the middle.   
After her nap, Spencer teetered into her room. Almost in awe of how much Harry had gotten done, she looked around with the biggest smile on her face. The walls were still wet so the furniture was kind of in the middle of her room, but she still loved it.  
"This room alright for you, Spence?" Harry knelt down close to her.  
"Yes!" She yelled before turning around and giving her daddy the biggest hug.   
He was only just getting used to this "being a father" thing but it didn't take much time at all to realise just how much he loved it.  
•••••  
Sasha was fast asleep when Zayn showed up. She still felt awfully sick today but Zayn missed her terribly and wanted to check in.   
After telling the guys the truth about his wife, Zayn started to feel a little better knowing he had people there for him.   
It was only a little while after Zayn arrived that Sasha woke. She smiled when she saw him and tried to sit up but quickly grimaced at the pain.  
"It's alright, I'll come to you." Zayn moved his chair closer to her and grabbed her hand. "Not feeling much better today."  
Sasha shook her head. "Can't keep anything down, can't sit up. Kinda just have to stare at the ceiling or sleep. The nurses come in and try to talk to me. The one who comes in the most always asks about you and the boys. She says she still remembers the first time she saw the five of you perform as a band. She voted every week and was absolutely heart broken when you didn't make it through. Then when she got word that you got signed anyway she was so ecstatic. Her and her little sister apparently went to your first ever tour too. She says Niall was her favourite all those years ago and seeing him with a girlfriend back then may have killed her but she asked me if you could spread it on that she's happy for him and his fiance."  
"Of course I will. That's actually really sweet, I'll bet he'd love to hear that. What's her name?"  
"Elissa Trescott. She told me last night that she feels a bit awkward reminiscing over a boy band seeing as how she's a couple years older than the lot of you. Her words exactly were 'my friends made fun of me for loving such a young boy band but when I see true talent, I can't help it."  
"How much older is she?"  
"She's 36 if I'm remembering correctly. But you wouldn't think she's a day over 21 if you looked at her. Absolutely gorgeous. And she has a son, Dominic is his name. She's shown me some pictures of him and says that even he likes One Direction."   
"Ha, was he even around before the break?"   
"Barely. He's 10 but with his mother being such a big fan, she says he knows all about the biggest boy band in the world."  
"Well I'm glad you have someone here to cheer you up when I can't make it. Elissa sounds like a lovely person and I'll be happy to share with Niall what she said."   
"Thanks babe." Sasha puckered slightly and Zayn leaned in to kiss her. He missed being able to kiss her whenever he wanted and hold her close as he slept. The house was lonely and their bedroom was cold. He didn't even like being in there anymore.  
"I miss you being at the house."   
"I miss it too. That was the first house I ever bought and I barely lived in it." Zayn slowly nodded. They'd bought the house right after their honeymoon and officially moved in only about 9 months ago. It had 6 bedrooms with a big den downstairs. It was meant for a family and here Zayn was completely alone in it.   
"Was thinking about selling it. Ya know? There's really not a point of having so much space for just me. I've done the whole big house thing before when it was just me and it was fine before I had you but now... I kinda just want something small."  
"But baby, we bought that house together. And we have so many good memories there. Won't you wanna remember that?"   
"I can remember without having to be there, babe. I think it'd do more bad than good to have to walk around that house everyday by myself, especially when you won't even be here."   
"I can't force you to keep the house. I understand it'll be hard. You're the one losing me." Sasha was choking up slightly. "When I look down on you, I'll just be happy to see you continuing on. Being strong for me."   
"I love you." Zayn said.  
"I love you too."  
•••••  
Niall was growing tired of Darian being so shady around him. It wasn't just the weird phone calls to "back home" but it was now the odd times she'd go use her computer and how everything she owned was now password protected. If Niall wasn't suspicious before, it sure made him now.   
They were very honest with each other and even though Niall had passwords on his stuff so he wouldn't get hacked by random people, Darian knew every single one of them. But now when she chose to put passwords on everything, she would freak out if Niall as much as looked over on accident while she was typing it in.  
"Do you mind?" She snapped at him one day when he looked down right as she was typing in her new password on her laptop.  
"I wasn't even paying attention."   
"Of course you weren't." Darian rolled her eyes and stopped off to the other room. "God you're so annoying sometimes." He heard her mutter under her breath.  
That was only a few days ago and it still bothered him. Why was she being so secretive?   
"Darian?" Niall called out to her. He was in the living room while she was on her laptop in their bedroom.   
"What do you want now?" She was on total edge ever since she thought Niall had been spying on her. They hadn't even had a normal conversation and every night she'd conviently gone out with friends for dinner and wouldn't come back until Niall was already fully asleep.  
"Can you come out here for a second?"   
"I'm doing something, Niall. Can you not just come in here?"  
Niall got up and shuffled to the bedroom. "I thought you didn't want me around when you were on the computer. Thought I was too annoying or whatever."  
"Oh stop being such a fucking baby. I said you can be annoying sometimes, not all the time. Get over it already."  
"Can we just talk like normal adults right now?"   
"I don't know. Are you gonna act like an adult for once?" She slammed her laptop and folded her arms across her chest.  
"Me? I'm not the one who hides out in here 24/7 because I'm trying to hide from my fiance. I'm not the one who calls you annoying before stomping off like a child to the next room. I'm not the one-"  
"Niall, I fucking get it. What do you want to talk about. I'm going out with the girls in a bit."  
"That! That's what I want to talk about. What's with this going out every night. And the calls home that are clearly not home because I doubt you're calling you're parents at 3am in the morning their time and you know damn well they'd be pissed if you called them at that time. You putting passwords on everything and being so fucking secretive. You know I'm not the jealous type. I wasn't worried in the slightest when you were in Canada and I was here because I trusted you but now I don't even know. I mean who are these girls even? You don't know many people over here except for your co-workers and all you ever do is call them bitches and say how much you hate them. What the fuck is going on!"  
Darian just stared at Niall while he stood there waiting for a response. He wasn't going down without one.   
"I don't have to tell you anything." Darian said.  
"That's awfully mature of you." Once again she just stared at him. "What's going on that you can't tell me? We're getting married soon, the biggest commitment of our lives and for a while now I feel like I don't even know you. There's nothing you can't tell me."  
"You wanna know?" She said, sitting up. Niall nodded in response. "You really wanna know?"   
"Just tell me." He said impatiently.   
•••••  
Liam was tucking in his son when he heard the phone ring. It only rang twice before Sofia got to it and answered.   
When he came out of Jason's room, Sofia stood there with the phone waiting for him.  
"Hello?" Liam said, Sofia continued standing there.  
"Can I spend the night in your spare room? I need to get out of here for the night." Niall sounded extremely angry on his end.  
"Uh yeah... sure buddy. We'll get the room ready for you right now. Everything alright?"   
"I'll tell you when I get there." Niall ended the call and Liam just stared at his wife.  
"Wonder what's got his feathers all ruffled." Sofia said as she walked with Liam to the spare room to get it ready for their guest.  
"Guess we'll find out when he gets here."


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *DISCLAIMER: I'm really not a doctor, so with Sasha's medical condition, I do my best with what google gives me. Obviously cancer is serious, I lost my great-grandpa to cancer when I was in 3rd grade, so I know how it affects people and their families. But his cancer wasn't brain cancer so I don't exactly know how it works. There will be a part were my naivety on the disease works, but I don't think it's a totally impossible situation so that's why I'm including it.*  
> HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!! It's been 11 days since my last update and since I'm doing absolutely nothing on this Halloween night because I'm apparently too old to Trick Or Treat.... no I'm not bitter.... but since I wasn't doing much, I'd figure it'd be best to update since I didn't last week. Hope you like it! So much is going on and I'm nearing a point where I can put a definite amount of chapters in this story. I know this seems like a really short filler, chapters are about to get lengthier because a lot more is going to be going on. Please bare with me, although short, I hope everything in it is actually good :)

Liam was extremely reluctant when he walked into the recording studio with has band of misfits and found out that they were recording some "fuck you!" songs as Niall and Zayn once coined them on the last album they did. Niall was in a rage and heavier stuff with loud music blasting around them was probably better than the love songs they'd be getting to.   
Niall was good at the house; nice around the kids. But the entire car ride, Niall cursed Darian as if he were born to do it.   
"I'll kick her ass out and send her back to Canada. Ya know? Fucking bitch. I can't even fucking believe it Liam."   
"I know." Liam said agreeing with Niall.  
"I fucking loved her and what does she do? Gets me all excited and shit to start a fucking life and family with her. Fucking move her out here just so she can fucking whore around."   
"I know."   
"Can't believe this fucking happened. How the fuck did this happen?"  
"I know."  
"Liam?" Niall raised an eyebrow at his friend.  
"I-.... oh. Sorry. What?"  
"Just.... fuck it. Never mind."  
"No, Ni, I'm listening. I swear! Just tryna remember the way. I'm shit at directions. You know that!"  
"It's fine. I'll have time to let more out at lunch. We're all going out right?"  
"Yeah. I think so. The others were fine with that, I believe."   
They got there in enough time so Niall's silence only lasted a minute or so before he could let it out in the studio. Lucky for him, the song they were recording was a song their friend Savan wrote about a cheating partner.   
"Fucking perfect, mate!" Niall said when they were told that's the one they were recording today. It was only a week or so ago that he thought the song wouldn't have a place on their album and now he was hoping it could be the title track.  
He could feel the others strange looks as he belted out his notes with an un-Niall-like rage in the booth and he heard Liam tell them he'd be explaining at lunch.  
There was one more equally as rock-esque, less "bitch how fucking dare you" as Niall so calmly put it before telling them to start the track.   
•••••  
"So that was um.... interesting." Harry said to Louis.  
"To say the least." Louis added. They followed behind Zayn as they headed to some remote little restaurant near the studio. Liam and Niall behind them.  
"Think Darian really cheated?"   
"Don't think ole Nialler'd be acting like that if she didn't. Hard to believe though, if she did, that is. Although I'm 98 percent sure, don't wanna go pointing fingers yet."   
They were both silent for a moment as Harry stopped at the stop light ahead of them.  
"Oh! Did you talk to Eleanor?" Harry brought up rather nonchalantly for what the talk was about.  
"Uh yeah... it's all good. She was just understanding as all of you said she'd be. Worried for nothing."   
"Louis, you alright, boo?"  
There it was, another confusing pet name that continued to lead Louis on and give him false hope. Especially after that seemingly meaningless kiss a while back. "Green light, Harry." Louis said, thanking God for that perfect time to cause a change in topic.  
Harry pressed the gas and the car began to move along behind their friend. "Lou?" Harry asked again, worry apparent in his eyes.  
"Nothing, Haz."  
"It's not nothing, babe. I know you."  
"No... you... stop calling me-" Louis cut himself off and brought his hands to his face.   
"Babe?"   
"Quit calling me babe and love and boo and all that shit. Alright Harry? It's fucking confusing and I'd rather not have to deal with that right now. Despite Eleanor being okay with everything, I'm still going to be going through a divorce and a new life transition and the girls don't understand what's going on, they just know their parents won't be together and I really don't need you in my life okay?" That last comment flew out of his mouth with such ease but Louis wasn't even sure where it came from but he wished he could take it back because he needed Harry. He just didn't need the confusion.   
The worry that was in Harry's eyes began glistening as tears started to form and slightly blur his vision.   
"Haz-"  
"No. It's fine, Louis. We're just band mates. It's fine. We don't have to pretend to be friends or anything like that. Don't worry. I won't call you anything you don't want to be called and I won't interfere anymore."  
"Harry."  
"Don't. It's really fine."  
"You're about to cry."  
"Fuck's sake, Tomlinson. I have something in my eye. Don't be ridiculous." Just as bad as Louis could dish it out, Harry could too. And just like that, Louis felt that pang of hurt Harry must've just been smacked with.  
"Okay." Was all Louis said. Silence taking over for the rest of the car ride.   
"Ride with Zayn or Liam back to the studio. If you wanna keep bumming rides off me, you're gonna have to pay." Harry said when they parked, slamming his car door behind him.   
•••••  
After lunch, the rest of the day was uneventful. Niall explained how Darian came out with it all and went into great detail about her fucking sessions with some guy called Tristian and how he gave her everything Niall couldn't. The only reason she didn't leave Niall was because it was "adorable how naive he was" and she liked the things he bought her.   
Liam offered up his place for Niall to stay until he could find somewhere to live. "That's my place, are you kidding me? I lived there well before she even thought about moving in. She can go fucking find a place with her perfect Tristian or be homeless for all I care!"   
Despite the situation, it was almost comical to see Niall mad because he almost didn't know how. Sure, he knew how to sling around some swear words like nobodies business but the actual act of being completely and utterly mad just wasn't in his nature. And he was just saying anything that came to mind in really loud tones and throwing his hands all over the place.   
But when you considered the situation, they knew it was only going to be his first stage. The love of his life has spent the past 4 months fucking another guy, many of which were under his own roof. In a few days, this rage could turn to denial or tears or false happiness or any possible emotion a person could go through when finding out something like this and the others were going to be there for him.   
•••••  
"Day 1 of recording done. A lot went down last night between Niall and Darian which lead to an interesting day at the studio and quite the story time at lunch. I'll tell you all about it tomorrow when I come see you. Tomorrow's a day off so I can probably spend most of the day, or what I can handle, at the hospital with you. Just holding your hand or talking. Whatever you want. I just miss you so much... About to go to sleep and this bed just doesn't feel the same without you." Zayn pressed send and laid down in his usual spot, the tv playing softly in the background. He usually didn't like sleeping with it on but now that Sasha wasn't home, he needed the filler noise.   
Zayn reached over back to his phone on his bed side table when he remembered he forgot to send "I love you" in his message. But as he picked up his phone, he saw he had a brand new voice mail. He wasn't going to check it until he recognized the number from countless forms he'd had to fill out not too long ago and his heart started sinking.  
"Hello Mr. Malik, this is your wife's nurse Elissa Trescott. We regret to inform you that there has been a significant dip in your wife's health condition and she's gone into a comatose state. You can come in whenever you'd like still to see her and the next time you do, her doctor will be more than willing to talk with you about why exactly this happened and what you can be expecting in the near future. See you soon, Mr. Malik."  
•••••  
Eleanor was apartment hunting when Louis was dropped off by Liam.   
"Hey, Lou!" She called out from behind her laptop. "I left some dinner out for you, the girls tried staying up to see you but they just got too tired." When she looked up she noticed his unpleasant expression. "What's wrong?"  
"Everything."  
"Louis... come sit." Eleanor closed her laptop and set it down on the coffee table in front of her. Louis plopped down next to her and placed his head in the nook of her shoulder. El began playing with his tousled hair as he sat there, feeling like crying but with no tears coming out.   
"I'm such a fucking idiot."   
"Why?" She tried not to chuckle.  
"I just am." Louis leaned up and looked at her. "I have feelings for one of the 5 idiots and-"  
"Harry." Eleanor blurted out. Louis shot her a look and she wasn't sure if it was because she was actually wrong or because she cut him off. "Please, not like it's never been obvious or anything."  
"Still... I basically told him off in the car and said I don't need him in my life. So there's that."   
"Louis, you can apologise and just tell him why you said it."   
"No I can't! El, he's not gay."   
"Okay, maybe not entirely, but don't rule out the possibility of him being bisexual or Louis-"  
"Don't even finish that one, love. Okay, yeah sure. Say he is. But he's certainly not gonna go for a guy like me."   
"Don't sell your self short, darling. You're perfect and even if it doesn't matter much, I think the two of you would be absolutely adorable together. Perfect actually."  
"Thanks. I just don't think an apology would work. He's got a lot on his plate and he doesn't need a case like me on his hands as well." Louis got up and muddled to the kitchen to fix himself a small plate to match his small appetite.   
He really hated himself sometimes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please let me know what you think with a simple comment. I'd realllllly appreciate, just so I know what people think. 
> 
> I've begun the writing process of another fanfic that I'll be posting on here close to the end of this one and sfajfboqindq sorry I'm just super excited about the idea for this one. Just figured I'd let y'all know :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I KNOW I'M TERRIBLE I'M SORRY GUYS I REALLY AM IT'S BEEN OVER A MONTH AND I SAID I WAS UPDATING A LONG TIME AGO BUT I GET DISTRACTED SO EASILY AND I SUCK I REALLY DO BUT I LOVE YOU AND I HOPE YOU CAN FEEL MY LOVE THROUGH THIS UPDATE! DONT HATE ME TOO MUCH

Sasha's funeral was extremely sad and it was difficult for Zayn to get through. He sat next to her family with his, and the guys, close behind. Luckily for him, Sasha was smart and had it all arranged in advance because she knew Zayn wouldn't be able to do it himself.   
It was only a few days after Elissa called that Sasha passed away, it was as peaceful as it could've been for someone so ill. In her sleep, her heart just stopped beating and in that moment, Zayn's whole world became his guardian angel. And although he's done a lot of crying over her loss, he knows she's still there watching over him and smiling because he's being able to carry on.   
Sasha's older sister made a video for the funeral with all of her best memories from the time she was born, all the way up to the wedding. At the end of the video, Larissa stood and made a speech.  
"Sasha was the nicest person you'd ever meet but she was strong and confident and always tough. She gave 100% in everything she did and even at her hardest moments, she never stopped. She always had a smile on her face, always truly happy just to be alive. I actually remember when she met someone very special to her. She called me saying she'd just ran into that famous guy from that boy band our younger cousins liked. She couldn't stop talking about his eyes and how to down to earth he was for being in the most famous band in the world. She left out the part about sneaking her phone number to him and a couple days later when I went over to her house, there Zayn was. Sitting on her couch. It was actually funny to see a celebrity sitting in your sisters flat, let me tell ya! I had my doubts at first that her little relationship with this big star but then I saw them together. Like really saw them and I saw someone come along and make my strong little sister just completely melt. He loved her unconditionally and Zayn, she loved you too. And I can't say how thankful we are for you. You were her rock and although you may have felt weak for crying here and there and not knowing what you were gonna do when this time came, you were what kept her strong through this whole time. And we all just want to say thank you for being everything she needed and deserved." Larissa couldn't continue because of her crying. Zayn, who was also in tears, got up and gave Larissa a huge hug.   
"Thank you" he whispered to her as they stood in front of everyone, embracing one another in comfort.   
After the emotional ceremony, Zayn hosted a simple dinner at his house for the families and the boys. And when he says simple, he means just that. Everyone changed out of their formal attire and came as they were in sweatpants and t-shirts. Zayn ordered pizza from Sasha's favourite place and instead of sitting there in their grief, everyone went around and shared their favorite memories of Sasha.   
Her mom talked about when she was little and would refuse to leave the house without an armful of her favourite stuffed animals. How it was just so adorable watching this little girl walk around with six or so stuffed animals in her arms wherever they went.   
Zayn shared stories about when they bought their first house and how hilarious it was watching Sasha pick them apart. It was honestly probably very annoying to their agent but he thought it was the funniest thing as she'd go through every room with a pad and paper, writing down everything that just didn't quite fit what they liked. One time she even wrote a note at the bottom of it for the poor guy saying "It's okay. You'll get it next time... I hope :) xx"  
The boys obviously didn't have much to say because they didn't know her all that well but they sat there and laughed along with everybody else and contributed as much as it could. It felt nice to celebrate Sasha's life this way. It felt right not crying over her but rather smiling and laughing about the way she carried herself and how strong she always was, how happy she was. This what she wanted and whenever Zayn would feel down about her not being around, whenever he'd want to stay in bed and cry and miss her because she wasn't with him, he'd remember this. He'd remember this feeling of loving her for everything she was and honouring her by getting up and carrying on and smiling and being himself as if she was right by his side, because she is right by his side, watching over him.   
It wasn't going to be easy, but Zayn was going to be alright.  
•••••  
The boys were back in the studio and although Zayn was fine and Niall was calmer than the other day after his incident with Darian, it was still a tense atmosphere as Harry and Louis gave each other the silent treatment. Louis looked like he was about to cry though and Liam knew that wasn't good, so while Harry was in the studio doing some melodies for a few different songs, he pulled him aside and decided to have a talk.  
"Mate, what's going on?" Liam said to Louis who's eyes were full and watery.  
"I don't know what you're-"  
"Please Louis, just tell me. I'm here for you. You know that!"   
"Liam I know but... This isn't just something you can fix."  
"But I can still try. I don't want to see you upset. Does it have anything to do with Harry? You've been extremely cold towards each other lately. What happened?"  
Louis stared at Liam for a minute before letting it out. "I kinda just told him that I was confused and that I didn't need him in my life and I didn't mean it. Honest! That's now what I meant to say, it just came out because I've been so stressed and how could I just tell him that I do need him in my life. Everyday. Because he's my best friend and I love him and I want to just lay down and cuddle with him like old times and feel safe with him again. And I wanna feel like that forever because I love him. Liam I can't say that!"   
"Louis.... why can't you? You know he'll understand."  
"I don't want him to just understand, I want him to feel the same way and you know he doesn't. He couldn't. Yeah he loves me as a best friend, or he used to anyway, but he doesn't love me like he wants to spend the rest of his life with me and I can't pore my heart out to him knowing that. I'd rather die with this being my secret then tell him and get denied because he's straight and doesn't have time for my shit."  
"Louis..."  
"Liam, I don't need your pity. Thank you for listening but I really don't need you to look at me with your big, sad eyes and tell me it'll get better because it won't. I'm in love with him and that's not just gonna go away but I can't tell him and I know that. I'll be fine and I'll deal with it just like I dealt with my other secrets."  
"Mate, you barely made it out alive with your last secrets."  
"Yeah well... It is what it is." Louis shrugged his shoulders and walked away. Wiping his eyes with his shirt before walking back to the rest of the guys.  
Liam felt bad for Louis because he knew his friend was selling himself short. What if Harry was open to a relationship? Louis didn't know if Harry was gay or bisexual or just wanted to have a relationship with Louis. But instead of even bothering to find out, Louis was gonna tuck himself away into a little cave of sadness and live with another painful secret because he was worried what people would think about his personal life. Well ya know what? It's pretty shitty that Louis has to continuously hide who he is because he's worried about what everyone else thinks about him. The people who truly cared about him, would stick by him no matter what and all the others who'd abandon him because he's gay? Well they can go fuck themselves! Just let him be happy. And you know what else? If he told Harry how he truly felt, regardless of how he felt back, Harry would probably be so gracious and sweet and no matter what be there for Louis because they're best fucking friends but Louis is so terrified that everyone will hate him for being himself. That people will be disgusted with him because of who he loves and it makes Liam sick. It's not fair that someone would ever have to hide one of the biggest parts of them self because of someone else's opinion.  
•••••  
"Liam, can I get a ride home with you?" Louis asked quietly so Harry couldn't hear just on the other side of the room.   
The recording session was over and Zayn had already headed out with Niall for some food and a catch up. Niall invited him out after recording a sad song and he could physically see Zayn's sadness. So that left Louis with only one option back home.  
"Are you asking me because you don't think he will?"  
"Liam, please."  
"Just ask him. If he says no, then I will. I'll slap him first and then I will."  
Louis rolled his eyes. "Don't be difficult Liam. I just need a ride."  
"Just ask him. Maybe throw in an apology for what you said. I understand that you don't want to go into a long explanation but just tell him that when you said it, you were upset and that's not at all what you meant." Louis glared at Liam before making his way to Harry.  
"Umm... Haz.."  
"Yeah?" Harry said without making eye contact with Louis.   
"Could I maybe get a ride with you? I rode here with Zayn but he already took off."  
"Liam's still here ya know."   
"I know but... I wanted to ride with you. I figured we could talk."  
Harry put down the papers he was sorting through and looked at Louis. "What more could you possibly have to say to me, Lou?"  
"Harry, I didn't mean what I said. You have no idea how sorry I am. It came out and I wasn't thinking and I was getting defensive and when I do that I just say shit. I don't think about it all and I really just want you to know I'm sorry! Because I am and I hate when you're mad at me."  
"I'll give you a ride, boo- LOU." Harry corrected himself quickly. "I'll give you a ride."   
"You can call me that, it's fine. I was being a little bitch when I said that but I miss it too much. No one calls me boo bear anymore. Well mum does, but she doesn't quite count."  
Harry laughed. "Okay, boo bear. I'm gonna go start the car." Harry smiled as he walked away and when he was out, Liam shouted across the room "I FUCKING TOLD YOU!" to Louis.  
Louis rolled his eyes jokingly as he walked out the door. He didn't have to say anything to Liam, he didn't need to give him anymore satisfaction of being right than he already had.  
Harry's car was as warm as his smile when Louis finally got to it. "Thanks for the ride, curly."  
"Curly! That one's been a while." Harry laughed as he drove his car out of the parking lot.   
"I have to pick up Spencer, do you wanna come with me?"   
"Uh... yeah sure." Louis had never officially met Spencer. The only time he saw her was the day Harry met him and it's not like Louis said anything. He kinda just watched from a distance as Harry's realization set in that he was a father.   
"Do you have a place to stay tonight?"   
"I mean, I still stay at the house. Eleanor is looking for a flat for herself even though I'm trying to convince her to keep the house and I'll move out. It only makes sense, I mean we'll be so busy soon with traveling and touring. Why give me the big house when I won't be in it much soon?"   
"Oh... okay." Harry looked slightly disappointed with Louis' answer.   
"Why?" Louis had a moment of bravery and asked.  
"I don't know. I was just thinking maybe you'd like to come over or something. It sounds so childish out loud and I know I have Spencer and you have your girls at home but I was just thinking it'd be nice to have some company."  
"I mean if you want me to spend the night, I don't mind and I don't think El would either."   
Harry smiled at that and Louis' heart skipped a beat knowing that his presence was making Harry happy.   
They drove in silence, but a happy one, as Harry drove down some windy roads to Bree's house to pick up his little girl.  
"I'll be right back." Harry said as they arrived at the house. Louis thought it was so cute how happy Harry was to have a daughter. He liked the car seat in the back of Harry's range rover and it warmed his heart to know that he was good with kids. His mind drifted to him and Harry one day having kids of their own. A merged family with Spencer and Louis' little ones. All happy together with Bree and Eleanor being good friends and even better mothers. But it was just a silly little fantasy. Harry wasn't interested in Louis that way.   
But Louis won't lie. When Harry walked out of Bree's house holding Spencer, it completely warmed is heart so much he was pretty sure his temperature was spiking, if such a thing was possible.   
The little girl looked so much like him with dark ringlets that resembled Harry's before he started styling it better. She had big round eyes that Louis could only assume were just as green as her daddy's. She was going to grow up to be a little heart breaker just like Harry and it was probably going to be hilarious watching Harry fight them all off.   
"Spencer, this is daddy's best friend Louis. Can you say hi to Louis?" Harry said as he put Spencer into her car seat.   
"Hi Louis!" The little girl said full of energy.   
"Hi!" Louis said waving back at her. "Not shy at all is she?"  
"She even says hi and waves to all the papz we see. It's actually quite funny that she doesn't see anything wrong with them following us around wherever we go. I just hope they don't try any funny business with her, ya know? Stuff they do could traumatize a kid her age."   
Harry shut the back door and got back into his seat. It was amazing how much more careful of a driver he was with his little girl in it. He was such a good father, Louis could see it only in the few minutes he'd been in the car with the two of them.  
When they pulled into the familiar drive way, Harry handed Louis the keys and asked him to unlock the door while he got Spencer out of the car. For someone so full of energy only 15 minutes ago when they picked her up, the little one had completely passed out on the way to the house.   
It felt like they were their own little family as Louis unlocked the door, greeted by another new addition to Harry's family, a little kitten. Harry mentioned that he'd gotten a little kitty with Spencer not too long ago when they bored one day. The pet, the house, the baby in the backseat. It was everything Louis wanted and sure, he'd had that all with Eleanor and don't get him wrong, he LOVED his daughters. With everything he had, they were his world and completely wrapped around his fingers, but this feeling of absolute love and family and feeling whole was something in all of his years of marriage, he didn't quite experience. And it never stopped him from being a good dad but it stopped him from enjoying his life and Louis only hoped that maybe this is something he could actually look forward to in the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reallllllyyyy excited for the next chapter. The ball really gets rolling in chapter 11!   
> Thank you to the kudos I've been getting on this story and I really wanna hear from y'all what you think so maybe leave a comment? I have my ideas about how I plan on ending this, but I really want to hear your ideas and I REALLY want to know what you think of Reunited so please leave your comments. I'll always read them and I'll always respond.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO TERRIBLE DON'T HATE ME!!!! It's been over a month and I already hate myself but I hope this chapter makes up for it!  
> I honestly kinda just went through this period where I'd want to write, I'd type a sentence, and then lose all creativity within me to finish the chapter but I got it done and here it is!

"Enjoy yourself! I've got the girls, you just have a good time tonight :)" Eleanor sent Louis, after he texted her saying that Harry wanted him to stay the night.  
Louis smiled as he read the message again. He loved how understanding she was and how easily she got what he was going through and why the last few years had been hell for him. Soon, they wouldn't be married anymore but Eleanor was a friend for life.  
When he walked through the front door of Harry's house, it felt like home in a way. Last time he was here, it left on an uncomfortable note and with all that's gone on, mainly Louis coming out, maybe it wouldn't be that way this time.  
Harry had gone to put Spencer to bed while Louis plopped himself down on the couch and looked around at the room knowing Lou had to have decorated this for him. No way would Harry Styles have successfully decorated an entire house on his own in coordinating colours if he couldn't even do that with the flat the two of them used to share.  
"Out like a light." Harry said as he walked down the hall, back to Louis. "So anything in particular you want to do?" Harry asked.  
"Maybe just watch a movie? I'm really tired myself and don't know if I can stay awake for much else."  
Harry smiled and took a step back down the hall, signalling for Louis to follow him. So of course he got up off the couch and headed for Harry's room.  
Louis closed the door behind him as Harry began to strip to nothing but his boxers, not any different than the last time Louis cuddled with him in Harry's bed, but this time a different meaning.  
"Get comfortable, babe. Are you really gonna sleep in your day clothes?" Louis looked down at his cuffed jeans and t-shirt combo outfit for a day of recording. Harry got under the covers and stared at Louis for another moment before finally Louis took off his shirt.  
Harry looked so sexy laying in his bed, the blanket just barely by his hips, his stomach and chest exposed, all his many tattoos out there. His hair pushed back, a smile spread across his lips, and a sexy glint in his eye. Oh the things Louis wanted to do to him. Grab his face and furiously kiss him, let his hands wonder. Down, down... down.  
"Louis?" Harry cut off his fantasy and snapped him back to the present moment. "You um... alright?" Harry's eyes weren't meeting his but rather another part of Louis, so he followed Harry's gaze and realised his little dream sequence there had gotten himself excited. So excited you could tell through his jeans.  
"Oh god!" Louis yelled before ducking into Harry's bathroom and closing the door quickly. He heard the blankets russle and the Harry's feeting padding over to the door.  
"Boo, what's wrong?"  
"Go away, Harry. I have a... situation."  
"Well I mean, I know that. But... it's not that big of a deal, Lou."  
Louis didn't know how to respond. He didn't even know what to do. He was just leaning against the door, with a hard penis after blatantly having sexual thoughts about Harry right in front of him. And now how was he supposed to get rid of this? He wasn't exactly comfortable shooting one off in Harry's bathroom and carrying on like nothing happened.  
"Louis, we're guys. Boners are a natural part of life for us. We just kinda have to take care of them and move on."  
"What, you want me to just take care of it now or something?"  
There was a silence on the other side of the door and Louis regrets saying what he did. Maybe he should've just jacked off silently while he had the chance.  
"Well... maybe I could kinda do that for you." Harry sounded timid and Louis almost fell over.  
"What?" he answered back.  
"Never mind. That was... no just.. you do what you need to do. I'll be out here when you're done."  
Louis took a deep breath and opened the door to see Harry curling himself up into a little ball on his bed. As he opened the door further and took a step out, Harry looked at him with glowing red cheeks.  
"I'm sorry."  
"No.. don't be. It just kinda surprised me that you said that." Louis climbed on to the bed, gently, keeping in mind that he was slightly sensitive in a certain area right now.  
"I don't know what came over me. It just seemed like the right thing to say at the time and if it freaked you out... I'm just... yeah."  
"Well, maybe I wanted you to help me and I was just really glad you asked." Louis took a leap of faith with that one and completely put himself out there in a fury of courage like he'd never had before.  
They both stared at each other, Louis doing his best to not think about Harry saying "nah, I'm over it. Go take care of it yourself." or any other horrible thing that could be said. But instead, Harry leaned in and kissed him. Different than the last time they kissed, this one was deeper and thoughtful. His heart was racing and his hands traveled up to Harry's hair, letting his fingers feel the soft waves.  
Harry's hands began to wonder, getting closer and closer to Louis' sensitive situation. Fumbling with the button on his pants, Harry finally got it undone just to fight with the zipper immediately after. It almost made Louis laugh at how nervous mr. suave was being because he knew there was no way he was usually this shaky.  
Finally the zipper got done and Harry's lips separated from Louis' so he could pull his pants off. He got them off quickly and planted another kiss on Louis' lips. A soft but quick one, as he focused his attention on Louis' crotch. He let his fingers traced the outline of Louis' hard cock through his boxers before he slowly used palm along it.  
Louis let out a soft moan and closed his eyes, hoping that maybe if he couldn't see that it was Harry, he wouldn't come as quickly.  
Harry tugged slightly at the top of Louis' boxers, trying to get them up. Louis lifted his hips off the bed to give Harry better access. And as he did so, the boxers came up and Louis' erect member flew up in Harry's face as if it were literally saying "suck me." For such an intimate moment, it was actually quite comical.  
Slowly, Harry massaged the tip and rubbed the precum down the shaft. Louis' moans got louder as Harry's pumps got faster. Harry leaned in closer and place his mouth on the head and used his tongue to graze it. Louis dug his hands into the bed and grabbed a handful of the covers. He was know fearing his moans were so loud they'd wake Spencer.  
Harry still used his hands to stroke Louis' cock while he sucked and licked the rest.  
"Oh my god... Harry!" Louis yelled out seconds before releasing. With no warning, Harry got a mouthful but like a trooper he still swallowed it. Some still slightly dripping down his chin, Louis smiled before taking off his shirt and using that to clean it up.  
"That was incredible. I can honestly say, I've never received a blow job quite like that!" Louis said.  
"I've never actually done that before." Harry said. His eyes big and almost child like as he sat at the foot of the bed by Louis feet, legs criss-crossed like a little kid. He looked so innocent for someone who literally just sucked another guy off.  
"Almost hard to believe... but I do believe you. That was the first time a guy's ever done that to me. Not like I'd have known any different... it seemed like you knew what you were doing... even though you didn't but it seemed liked you did... and I'm gonna stop talking because I keep putting my foot in mouth." Harry laughed at Louis' rambling before leaning up to him. Their faces were really close, lips close. Louis began to close his eyes but Harry stopped getting closer.  
"I just wanna make sure it's okay to kiss you, ya know since my mouth was just all in your business, I didn't want you to-"  
"Just fucking kiss me!" Louis said before pulling Harry to him and kissing him.  
After a minute of cuddling and kissing like that, Louis pulled his boxers up while Harry turned out the lights and put a movie on. The two got under the covers and cuddled until they were both asleep in one another's arms.  
•••••  
The boys were all meeting for breakfast at a cute little diner not too far outside of London but in a remote enough area that they would be alone.  
Louis sat in the passenger seat scanning through twitter but not really looking at anything while Harry drove. There was an unsettling silence in the car that caused knots in Louis' stomach, especially after the night they just had.  
"Hey, I have a question." Louis asked quietly, almost so that he wasn't sure Harry even heard him.  
"Sure, what is it?" Harry said soft and sweetly.  
"Did last night like... define anything for us or was it just a one time deal?"  
Harry was silent for a moment after and the knots in Louis' stomach tightened. The wheels in Harry's head were spinning though because he wasn't really sure if it defined anything for them. It wasn't like it was a date, hours earlier Harry hated Louis' guts, well at least he wanted to hate Louis' guts. The act was almost their form of casual make-up sex. It didn't really put a definite mark on anything though.  
"I'm not sure, Lou. I think for right now we kinda keep that between us. Ya know? If it got out people might jump to conclusions. And not that I really care what people say, I just know it used to get to you and I don't want you to get hurt by what people may say if it all got out there and we don't really back it up by saying 'yeah, we're together.' Plus, you're still technically married. It just wouldn't be good to say anything or act on it just yet." Harry looked over at Louis as they approached a red light and could see tears welling up in his eyes. "Louis? Please don't cry. I'm sorry. I don't think any less of you, you know that right? I'm just saying we don't say anything to anyone right now. It's so much easier to keep it from the media when we keep it to ourselves that way we know nobody can tell anyone else. Just please don't cry, okay? If you start crying, I may cry."  
"Don't cry just because I'm upset." Louis said. He took a breath and closed his eyes, hoping the tears would go away and stop threatening to spill over. "And I get what you're saying. I'm just a little... I don't know. Never mind."  
"You don't have to be afraid to speak your mind around me. I want to know what's going on with you. I don't want you to get depressed again. I like you being happy and smiling. I like it when you laugh. I don't like it when you cry and you clam up. It makes you say things you don't mind and it makes you act like someone you're not. I won't judge you or hate you or be mad at you for what you have to say." Even though Harry was looking at the road and not at Louis, he hoped he believed him.  
"I'm just a little confused about us. I mean yeah, I get not telling people for fear of it getting out but what I'm concerned about isn't people knowing. It's about us and what we're gonna be. I'm sorry Harry but I like you a little too much to have casual flings with you and act like they're nothing. Because whether or not they mean something to you, they mean a whole lot to me. Every time you kiss me, my heart could explode because of how fast it beats. So I get where you're coming from but it's not where I'm trying to go." That was about as honest as Louis has been in a long time and even though it should feel good to get that off his chest, he felt vulnerable. Like Harry could pull over and kick him out of the car and never have anything to do with him ever again. Although he doubted it, that's how he felt. His heart was on his sleeve which was weird because for as long as he could remember, he always had a brick wall around it and now it's just out there.  
"Okay. Um.. just. Give me one second so we don't get lost." Harry took the minute or two to get the rest of the way to the diner to gather his thoughts. When they pulled in and Harry parked, he took a deep breath. "Louis, you're my dearest and best friend in this whole entire world. And when we kiss and when we're together, I feel something. Like something I've never felt before with anyone I've dated or hooked up with or any of that. It's different and it's exciting but it's terrifying. Because even at the peak of everyone thinking we were romantically together, I was convinced I was straight. And although I never beat myself up at the potential of liking guys, I also never thought I ever would. The feelings that I'm having for you are different in so many ways because not only have I never felt this way for any girl before, I've never even began to think about feeling this way for a guy. And you're so important to me that I don't want to rush into anything.  
Like last night, it was all so new. Doing what I did. I've never done that before and maybe it seemed like I knew what I was doing, but I really wasn't. I was clueless. I'm completely clueless when it comes to being with a guy and dating a guy and being in love with a guy. And you're the last person I want to put through the ringer just to get hurt because I do something stupid and fuck up our relationship. So if what you're looking for is a definition of what we are, then as of right now, I think we just go really slow. Like slower than slow because I don't know what I'm doing and I don't want to hurt you. I think we should wait until your divorce is finalized and then go from there. Last night I got a little carried away and jumped the gun but if we do become anything, I need it be taken slow. Right now, you and me, slow, no labels. Just beginning and seeing where it takes us. I just can't deal with hurting you."  
Louis didn't quite know what to say. It was all out there. Harry had feelings for Louis but he didn't quite know what to do with them. And it was sweet that he didn't want to hurt Louis but he still wanted to try even though he didn't really know exactly what it was that he was trying.  
But he wanted to take it slow and slow scared Louis because the slower they went, the easier Harry could get bored and just decide this wasn't for him. That Louis wasn't what he wanted. But Louis also didn't want to say no. Slow wasn't Harry saying no, it was Harry saying yes with a condition. A slightly grueling but still doable condition.  
"Can I kiss you?" Louis asked.  
Harry smiled and nodded so Louis leaned in and kissed his lips softly and gently. Slowly.  
•••••  
The boys were piled into their booth, a table full of food that they were all sharing. Goofing off like boys do as if it were back to their early x factor days when they could still go to places where they could go unrecognized. No cares, no stress, nothing going on that they couldn't handle even though the second they got up from the table they'd be smacked in the face with a billion different things that were going on presently. Their individual struggles mixed with the stresses of the new music, the upcoming interviews, the media, the tour, the craziness of being back in the spotlight.  
After the meal was finished and the conversations died down, they boys divided up the bill and shared the expense of a tip. They got up from the table and made their way back to their respective cars to finish their day off before another day in the studio tomorrow.  
Liam had plans to go out shopping with Sophia and the kids. Probably see some kiddy movie and then head back home for games and a nice home cooked meal.  
Niall would go back to his house and have several pints while catching up on old movies and various sporting events, maybe chat up Greg and talk to his nephew for a bit about how his football league was going. Promising him he'd make it to a game before it ended. A promise he'd promise himself to keep for one of his favorite kids in the world. But as happy as he'd tell himself he was, he could flip in five seconds if the thought of Darian crept into his mind. She still hadn't come by to get the last of her belongings. Niall had thoughts of burning them but he didn't quite have the heart to do it. As tough and unphased as he was coming off about the whole situation, he was completely shattered on the inside.  
Zayn was allowing himself to wander about the house more. He often kept to himself in the living room and kitchen. He didn't much go in the bedroom or the office anymore. Although their wedding portrait hung above the mantle in the living room, their room was where they slept, the office was their go at being proper adults. It was spaces they created just for them and it was weird for him knowing she wasn't going to be in either of them anymore. So he slept on the couch and when he didn't order take away, he'd make a meal in the kitchen. He felt comfortable in those parts of the house. But when he got home from the diner, he'd decided to sort through the office and find the random things they'd filed away, trying to act like they knew what they were doing. He may even sleep in their bed tonight. He'd still leave the television on so he wouldn't feel so alone.  
Harry dropped Louis off back at his house, kissing him gently as he got out of the car. He wanted to tell him he loved him but he couldn't bring himself to do so. He couldn't say it yet. It wasn't the right time. He believed that this had to be slow to be right. He had no idea what he was doing and he had no business fucking up Louis' life just so he could figure it out. Harry could recover easily, Louis, not so much. After Louis was home, Harry picked up Spencer again and ran to the store to get some microwave popcorn, various candy, and a few random dvds for them to watch. He'd order pizza and have a movie night in with his little girl.  
Louis walked through the door and was immediately greeted by his girls and Teddy. Eleanor was all smiles when he greeted her in Michelle's room who'd apparently just gotten up from a nap. He smiled too and was able to have a nice day with them. It was brisk outside but they all put on sweaters and played in the backyard with the dog. Louis and Eleanor also took the time after the girls went to bed to plan out just how they'd approach telling them about the divorce. They agreed to do it together and explain to them that just because mummy and daddy weren't going to be married anymore didn't mean they loved the girls any less. They would still be doing a lot together because mummy and daddy were still friends. They would still be a family. Louis also convinced Eleanor that she needed to keep the house. It made no sense for her to find her own place if Louis was going to be traveling soon anyway. Eleanor of course asked about his night with Louis. He spared some details but told her that him and Harry were completely honest with each other. Louis let his guard down and Harry didn't hurt him, he understood and wanted to take things slow. And although Louis' love for Harry was almost uncontrollable, if it meant he'd finally be happy again, he would go slow. He'd go as slow as he possibly could.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please please please let me know what you think! I really want to hear opinions of the people who are reading this. Predictions, comments, questions, concerns. Anything!


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I won't even state the obvious about you guys hating me because it's obvious.... I'm a terrible person who hasn't updated since January.... y'all are more than entitled to hate me and I hope this chapter is worthy of those who have waited long and hard for this next chapter. Oh my gosh I love you guys for sticking with me here!

Louis could see the confusion on Lucy and Ashlynn's faces. They didn't exactly know what was going on right now but confusion was better than hurt, anger, or sadness but maybe confusion was all of those things for his little girls.   
Eleanor and Louis had sat the girls down and told them that mummy and daddy would soon no longer be together but it didn't mean that they didn't love each other or them any less. It just meant that they weren't meant to be together the way that they used to be.   
Finally after a moment or two of silence Lucy asked "Will we still be a family like always?" and to be honest, it near broke Louis heart. Her eyes were big and staring at both of them, waiting.   
"Of course we will, baby." Eleanor said in her softest, most comforting voice. "No matter what happens, we will always be a family. Nothing's going to change that, baby girl."   
Louis nodded, agreeing with her. "And even though we won't always be together like we are now, we'll still be a family. Sometimes you'll be with just mummy or just me and sometimes we'll be all together but we'll never be too far apart. Okay?"   
Both girls nodded; they both even smiled a little bit. Maybe they don't fully understand what was going on but as long as they still had their family, it would still be okay for them.   
"Ready for bed girls?" Eleanor asked standing up. The girls jumped up and followed her to their rooms leaving Louis by himself to think.   
The girls didn't seem all to phased and it probably had something to do with age. But maybe they knew more than he was giving them credit for and it just really was a good deal made out of a shitty situation.   
He wondered if they'd still accept him when they one day find out he's gay. It's probably something they wouldn't really pick up on at this age but when they're older and he has a relationship with a man, would the mind? What if it was Harry? Could "Uncle Harry" be accepted as a step-father or would they both be viewed as freaks and bad fathers and.. Louis was getting ahead of himself.   
He agreed to take things slow with Harry and sure, burning, passionate love is hard to take slow, but slow and steady wins the race and if Harry was the prize, he'd crawl if he had to.   
Eleanor came back into the dining room a little while later to see Louis still sitting exactly where he was before.   
"Anything on your mind, dear?" She asked, sitting back down next to him.   
"Just Harry. I know it's stupid and I shouldn't think this much about it, but I can't help it."   
"Thinking's good. Well sometimes, as long as it's good thoughts. Sometimes realistic thinking isn't too bad, gotta keep from thinking a little too far-fetched. Just don't get down on yourself. He's never done this before, not that you have either but this idea of being with a guy probably hasn't come up too often in his head and he's probably scared. A lot is going on right now, ya know? The band, his daughter, you. It's all positives but it can still be overwhelming. And he'll be stressed out and it won't be perfect, he won't be and I don't want you blaming yourself or hurting yourself because of it. You understand?"   
"I do... I just don't him to think he has to do this. I know how I feel about him but I've felt this way for as long as I've known him. For years I suppressed my feelings to try and be what I thought was normal but that still doesn't compare to how long I've loved him and he hasn't had that time and I don't expect him to just feel the way I feel for him over night. I don't even really expect him to fully accept it either. People like him don't go for guys like me.. or guys at all."   
"Louis." Eleanor stared at him with a disapproving look.   
"You've gotta admit it's true. He's had his.. gayer moments, but all in all Harry Styles is a fairly straight character. And if you didn't really notice, you wouldn't think of him ever going for a fairy like me."   
"I get that but I just don't want you selling yourself short. Okay? I'm going off to bed, super tired. You get some rest too. Big last day of recording tomorrow!"   
Louis gave Eleanor a hug before she got up and went off to her room. Their old room. He didn't really miss it. He missed Harry's room more. His two nights spent their felt like home to him. Being with Harry just felt right. All kinds of right. The kind of right he couldn't even begin to explain because he'd sound crazy describing such perfect things. He loved Harry, but he was taking it slow. For both of their sakes.   
•••••  
The last day of recording was worth the wait. Maybe not ten years of it but when the headphones were hung up and every single last note was recorded, the boys knew they'd put together an album worthy of this reunion. Each song gave off vibes of classic One Direction for the classic fans who never lost faith that one day a new album would come out, as well as a fresh vibe for the new fans that may or may not come along.   
Each of them knew the anticipation for this album, the next single, a new video, more interviews, was through the roof which was crazy considering the average fan was in their mid to late twenties at this point. The ones who were 16 ten years ago could have a completely different life from their fangirl days, yet the second the reunion was announced, the buzz of it hadn't stopped. It was absolutely mad.   
Simon came into the studio today, Eric joined him today and it was the first time any of the boys had seen Simon's son since he was real little. He sat in the corner of the studio, glued to his phone, while the others talked business. Namely, the very first One Direction single in 10 years.   
"It's gotta be a good one." Simon said, "Something that'll grab everyone and anyone's attention. I want every radio station playing it and I want everyone in the world to know that you guys are back and better than ever." Simon could barely even sit still, he was that anxious, and it was rubbing off on the others.   
"So something upbeat, right? Is that kinda what we're aiming for?" Liam asked. He flipped through the various songs they'd recorded. "What about this one?" Liam handed one of the sheets to Simon who scanned it.   
"18 Again" Simon read the title and all the boys simultaneously smiled.   
"Our genius song writer Tommo busted that one out for us!" Niall said proudly, patting his pals back. Louis beaming as Simon began nodding his head.   
"Perfect." Simon looked up from the sheet with the biggest smile on his face. "Absolutely brilliant."  
"You haven't even heard it yet." Louis said, semi-doubting that the song could be that good for Simon to choose on the spot like that.   
"I don't need to. Louis, this is exactly what I needed for this single. It's fresh but it's also exactly where you guys left off 10 years ago and everyone who's waited all these fucking years want this. I don't need to hear it, I just need it ready for radio as soon as possible." Simon stood and handed the paper back to Liam. "I'm real excited for this, boys. And I think a lot of people will be just from the title alone. I'll get a press release together. Are you ready for the media explosion?"   
The boys all looked at one another and nodded.   
"Cause it's going to get a lot crazier than what it is now and what it ever was before. This is one of the biggest comebacks this generation has experienced."   
"Oh, come on!" Niall said, laughing slightly.   
"I'm not joking. I don't think any of you realize just how many people have been waiting for this moment." Simon looked at each boy. "This is massive."   
Each of them stood there, not really knowing what to say. They weren't even really believing that this was all happening. It wasn't easy to do what they were doing.   
"I'm gonna jet on out of here, you boys hang around as long as you want but I think we have a real winner here with this single and if the rest of the album is this good, I wouldn't want to be against any of you right now. Because they'd definitely lose." Simon signaled for Eric and the kid with his nose glued into his electronics, he still managed to see his dad.   
"I can't even believe this... Is the song that good?" Louis asked.   
"Probably one of your best, Lou." Liam replied.   
"Ahhh, I can't believe this!" Louis said again, this time even more excited than the lost.   
It was all beginning to set in. The album was recorded, all that was left was piecing it together. After that came picking the title, picking a date, announcing it's release, and planning a tour around it. After that, it was all in the fans hands. The success of this album was at the will of those wanting to buy it. Yeah it's all gumdrops and roses right now while everything is just talk but what if the world decides they don't actually care and when the album comes out, the only people who buy it is someone who accidentally thought One Direction was someone else. Could that actually even happen? Well if it could, it would definitely be this band of misfits that it'd happen to!   
•••••  
Harry walked Louis to his car, conveniently allowing themselves to be the last two to leave the studio.   
"Pretty damn proud of you, Lou. You know that?" Harry put his hand on top of Louis' car and looked down at him as he sat in the drivers seat.   
"Why's that?" Louis looked up at him.   
"Just your song! The fact that you're capable of writing something so amazing just blows my mind. And with everything you've been through, to bounce back with a hit like that. I'm just really proud."   
"Well thanks, darling. The song means a lot to me. You know, I was 18 when I met you."   
"Is that where the inspiration came from?"   
Louis nodded. "I just thought back to that first year when everything was uncertain. Nothing was guaranteed for any of us but life was still so great."   
"It's a mad adventure, that's well worth taking." Harry quoted one of the lyrics from the song and Louis could feel his cheeks burning.   
"My biggest risk, a mistake worth making." Louis finished the line.   
"See, absolute genius." Harry smiled before leaning down and giving Louis a tender kiss.   
"Breakfast tomorrow?" Louis asked.   
"Sure thing, babe." Harry grabbed the car door and let Louis get situated in his seat before shutting it. He winked and blew Louis a kiss as he walked away and Louis did the same back.   
Louis watched Harry get into his car and pull out of the parking lot, following behind him but only for a minute before they both went down different roads to make their way to their own homes.   
Louis was half concentrating on the road whilst scanning the radio to find a decent song and thinking about Harry.   
The way Harry smiled at him made Louis' heart literally ache with love. He wanted to pull him into his car and kiss him as hard as possible for as long as possible and not care about anything else in the world but his lips on Harry's.   
An old song caught Louis attention but he was going so fast through the stations that he had to go back and find it. He was so concentrated on finding the song that he didn't even see the red light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WAS IT OKAY?!?! I hope it was worth the wait, I'm so awful. Please let me know what you think in the comments. I always reply because I have no life. "If you have no life, why don't you update more!" I'M SORRY, CAUSE I'M TERRIBLE AND SOMETIMES I GET WRITERS BLOCK. Okay lovelies, I promise the next update won't take 3 months... I hope.   
> twitter and instagram- @ronnieboobear   
> tumblr- shadow-of-a-lonely-girl.tumblr.com   
> :)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG BACK TO BACK UPDATES WHAT EVEN IS THIS!!! I felt bad for all the inconsistency in updates lately, like holy crap a 3 month wait for just one chapter?! So I've decided to post chapter 13 tonight instead of waiting until next week since it's already written. Enjoy :)

"One Direction member Louis Tomlinson air-lifted to hospital after severe car accident"   
The accident had just happened but it was already everywhere. Most headlines were similar to this one on every gossip and news site and each article had the same words spewed across the pages along with made up rumors from fake sources. It seemed that every hour on twitter Louis had either died or made a miraculous recovery but no one had said anything about it yet and just as one rumour would be confirmed false, another would start up.   
The other boys had just gotten to the doors of the hospital when a flood of reporters and papz swarmed in around them. Their body guards blocked them as best as they could so they could get through the doors and to safety. Zayn hesitated slightly, being the last to walk through the doors of the hospital he knew all too well. He hoped he wouldn't lose yet another important person in his life in one of these rooms. A familiar-looking nurse and a group of doctors rushed past him and the others right as they'd walked in.   
Harry was in tears and needed Liam to help him stand. He felt sick to his stomach and couldn't contain himself thinking about Louis being alright or not. They knew nothing except that Louis' car was hit by a pick-up truck going 20 over the speed limit. Harry was told that Louis failed to stop at the red light so it was technically his fault but he knew damn well if the truck had been going the limit, the accident wouldn't have been so traumatic. Thinking of it was making Harry nauseous.   
The frenzy outside got louder as the door opened. Eleanor rushed in as the door was held open for her. She wasn't crying but she looked like she could be close.   
"What's all going on? Hear anything new?" Liam shook his head as he continued to hold onto Harry who was trembling. Eleanor ran to the front desk where a women in pink scrubs stood looking from the computer to a stack of papers and back. "Ma'am?" The women looked up. "Hi, I know you're busy but could you tell me about Louis.. Tomlinson. Have you heard anything that you could tell us that might calm some nerves?"   
The women shook her head. "I'm sorry, dear but I haven't. He's in the ICU and being examined by doctors but I'm sure as soon as they know what's going on, some will be out to tell you."   
Eleanor felt the tears stinging her eyes as she walked back to the others. "She doesn't know anything except that he's being examined."   
Niall looked down at his feet and stood close to Zayn for his own comfort as well as his friends. Liam looked strong supporting Harry but everyone could see it in his face that he was wrecked. Harry had his head buried into Liam's chest with slumped shoulders and visibly shaking. Eleanor leaned over and gently rubbed Harry's back. He lifted his head slightly and when he saw it was her, he let go of Liam and grabbed onto her.   
"He's gotta be ok." Harry whispered.   
"I hope so, Harry." Eleanor whispered back.   
"No. He has to be." Harry took a breath, his voice shaking. "He can't go like this."   
Eventually the group made their way to the waiting area where they sat for what seemed like hours. Harry had his head on Liam's shoulder and held hands with Eleanor. Niall sat next to Zayn who sat crouched over, examining his hands.   
Three hours after arriving, someone finally came out and everyone except Harry stood. He couldn't, but he listened.   
"Hi, I'm Dr. Hayes." He introduced himself. "So I've got some bad news and some... better news. I wouldn't call it good just yet but it isn't terrible." Dr. Hayes paused briefly, "He'll live. Barely and most of us don't know how he made it but he did and he's stable now."   
"That's the not terrible news right, because if that's what you call bad news then..." Eleanor trailed off.   
"No, that's the not terrible news. Although alive, he's suffering from very serious injuries. Several broken ribs, his right leg is shattered. He has bruises and cuts along his arms and a few on his face but those were actually not too bad and the scan results show that he does have a concussion but we aren't aware of how severe or permanent it is just yet. We're prepping him for surgery right now and when it's over and he wakes up, we'll able to see how much he knows and just how much damage the injury caused. By the time the surgery is over, the swelling in his brain will have gone down enough to be able to tell."   
"Wait, is he stable enough to even go into surgery?" Liam asked.   
"Yes. He was responsive after we ran some tests on him and before he feels too much pain from the broken bones, we need to perform the surgery." The doctor took one step back, signalling that it was his time to leave. "As soon as the surgery is complete, I'll come back out and let you know what's going on."   
"And when we can see him?" Eleanor asked.   
"Yes, that too." The doctor rushed back off down a hallway and around the corner, out of their sight.   
They all turned back around and Harry was curled up in his seat.   
"Can I talk to him alone?" Eleanor asked. The guys nodded and wondered off, following Zayn who knew that hospital inside-out.   
"He's gonna be ok, Harry. Just like you said." She knelt down to get more on his level.   
Harry slightly unfolded himself to look at her. "Okay, sure, he's gonna live but is he actually going to live or will he be hooked up to wires for the rest of his life because of the brain damage. Will he be able to walk? Or will everything be ok and once he's all healed up, life will go back to normal for Louis Tomlinson because I don't see that happening. Do you?" Harry was almost yelling but Eleanor let him. If he needed to yell, then he needed to yell.   
"I can't answer those questions, I can only hope for the best. All I know is that it's miraculous enough that he's alive and at this point we can't ask for much more than that."   
"Well I wish it was me."   
"Harry." Eleanor looked at him but he couldn't look back.   
"I do. He doesn't deserve this. He's spent so much of his life feeling defeated just because of who he is and when he finally is starting to feel ok, when things are finally looking up for him, he gets knocked down even further. Louis is the most amazing person I've ever met in my life and the fact that he can't catch a fucking break kills me because he doesn't deserve half of this shit. He doesn't deserve hate for being gay and he didn't deserve the depression he got from trying to hide who he was. He doesn't deserve the unsettling feeling he gets that everything is gonna go wrong. He certainly doesn't deserve this mess!" Tears were rolling down Harry's cheeks as he spoke and his breath was catching on almost every word.   
"You can't help what's happened to him, you can make his present and his future better but there's no taking back what's been done." Eleanor reached for Harry's hand but he jerked it away.   
"You know, sometimes I don't want to hear your deep, philosophical bullshit that just because life sucked before, we can turn around and make it better. I just want you to fucking agree with me that he doesn't fucking deserve any of this!" Harry stood up, the tears coming harder, he was breathing heavier. "I'm fucking scared right now, ok! I just want him to be alright so I can tell him I fucking love him. Because I do love him, I'm just too much of a fucking pussy to tell him that and the second I got the call saying what happened I thought I'd never get the chance. Fuck taking things slow, I can't lose him!" Harry fell to his knees, his hands shooting up to his face as his cries got louder.   
Eleanor had no idea. She only knew Louis' side of the story and that Harry wanted to take things slow, which she respected and quiet honestly expected so the fact that Harry loved Louis probably just as much as Louis loved him, took her by surprise. She reached around to Harry and loosely held onto him, just for the comfort. "You won't lose him, Harry." Eleanor gave his back a pat before helping him up to a seat.   
"Don't tell anyone I said that, El. Please. I know I love Louis, I really do, but just like I told him... I can't risk it. I want him to know so fucking bad but what if I get cold feet and decide this isn't what I want?"   
"You don't want me to be philosophical right? You want a genuine answer from me?" Harry nodded. "Life fucking sucks and more times than not, none of know what we want until it's too late." Harry shook his head and looked down. "Not what you wanted to hear?"   
"Not exactly."   
"Well it's the truth and you wanted the truth. I can sugarcoat it with fancy words but it doesn't get rid of what's really there."   
Both Eleanor and Harry were silent for a few minutes. Harry wiped his face and stood. "I'm gonna find the guys. Want to come?" Eleanor nodded, got up, and followed Harry. They walked around various hallways until it led them to a big open room with tables and different food stations. Liam, Niall, and Zayn at at one of those tables all looking down at their hands or picking at the table. None of them were talking.   
Niall's head perked up slightly when Harry and Eleanor approached, smiling slightly. About as much as he could at a time like this. "Pull up a chair." He said.   
The whole group was silent, not knowing what to say. They were all fragile in their own ways and thinking about what they had at stake from this. Liam would lose his partner in crime and for Niall the person he truly looked up to the most out of the gang. Zayn feared the loss of another person close to him after just losing the love of his life within these walls of this very building. Eleanor worried about her little girls and how they'd cope with the lose of their daddy. Harry tried not to think about losing his love, but it was at the forefront of his mind. Louis had always been the most important person in his life even in the times they didn't speak, it was always Louis.   
•••••   
The familiar looking nurse that ran past Zayn and the boys earlier found them in the hospital cafeteria at around 1am. Eleanor left a few hours earlier to be with her daughters and the others had fallen asleep, heads pressed to the table.   
"Zayn?" The nurse said. She had her purse slung over her shoulder and an apple in her hand. "It's me, Elissa. Understandable if you've put me out of your mind. I was your wife's nurse."   
"Oh yeah! Sorry, I didn't actually forget about you. I'm just... stressed."   
"It's fine." Elissa smiled slightly but he could see the uncertainty in her expression.   
Niall peaked his head up from the table and Zayn watched Elissa's eyes shift to him.   
"Hi." Niall said in a husky voice. "How's Louis?"   
"Oh, I'm um.. he's still in surgery. I know it's been a while you've been waiting here but I was actually heading home. Gotta catch the last bus."   
"Bus? At this hour." Niall sat up a little further.   
"Last one comes through in about 15 minutes. I don't drive." Elissa shrugged her shoulders and took a step towards the exit.   
"Here, why don't you let me drive you. It's late and I need to stretch my legs a bit." Niall stood up and stretched out completely.   
"Oh, you don't have to." Elissa was blushing and Zayn watched the whole thing unfold. All of a sudden the conversation from a long time ago with Sasha came to memory. Elissa used to have a massive crush on Niall, this was probably a huge moment for her. Zayn began to grin but eagerly covered it up for her sake.   
"It'd be my pleasure." Niall walked over to her and stretched his arm out for her to grab just like a gentleman. Elissa smiled even bigger and looped her arm around his.   
Good for Niall and good for Elissa too. Niall hadn't even really been looking at girls since the Darian situation and as far as he knew, Elissa didn't date much either. Sasha probably would've told him about it.   
•••••   
Niall was back just in time for Dr. Hayes to find them in the cafeteria. Niall woke up Liam and Zayn lightly shook Harry awake. He was groggy until he saw the doctor and then his eyes shot open.   
"Is he ok?" Harry said eagerly.   
"He's in recovery right now. The surgery on his leg was long but successful." Dr. Hayes nodded his head proudly at his own work.   
"Will he be alright though. Like, will he be able to walk and stuff?" Liam asked.   
"In time, not right away. His leg was severely broken." The doctor pulled up a chair and sat down by the table. "When he's released, he'll need a wheelchair for at the very least 45 days. After that, if he's stable enough, we'll be able to give him a boot and crutches to use. Once he's gained better mobility, we'll start him in physical therapy."   
"How long until he's released?" Niall took his turn asking a question.   
"We aren't sure just yet. I'm sorry, I know you want to know every detail but while he's asleep, we don't know his pain level. Like I said before, he broke a couple of ribs in the accident and we're currently unaware of how much pain it'll cause when it comes to moving around or even breathing."   
"What about his concussion?" Liam asked.   
"The swelling went down significantly while he was in surgery and we'll be able to know in the morning after he's woken up just how damaging it was. But we're all fairly certain, that the injury was standard and his memory and mind will walkaway untouched, miraculously."   
Harry wanted to burst into tears. Happy tears. It wasn't the best news in the world, I mean for gods sake Louis was going to be in excruciating pain when he woke up but he was going to live. He was going to walk and talk and be his normal self again!   
"When can we see him?" Zayn asked the doctor.   
"He's asleep right now and on some very strong painkillers on the off chance he doesn't sleep straight through until morning, but if one at a time you want to go in and see him, you can. But really, one at a time. Too much excitement in their isn't a good idea right now."   
All of the boys looked at Harry, instantly. They wanted him to be the first one in their. "We don't need to see him until later on, Harry. So if you want to go in their, that's fine by us." Liam said, the others shaking their heads.   
Harry waited for a second but as the doctor stood, so did he. "Just follow me." Dr. Hayes said. They went around the back, not going through the lobby and into the post-op wing.   
Dr. Hayes opened the door to room 425 and let Harry in. Louis was hooked up to an IV and was propped up just-so in the bed so when he woke, the pain wouldn't be as intense. At least that's what the doc said on the way over.   
Louis had a baseball sized bruise right below his right ear and a jagged cut along it. His face had tiny little cuts on it but they were cleaned up pretty well and they didn't look too deep. The one just above his left eyebrow had two little stitches in it, but that was the worst when it came to his face. His torso was covered with a light blanket but when his eyes got to Louis' legs, he saw the blue sterile blanket on his right one. Dr. Hayes also explained that it was something they used to prevent infection after surgery. They had to change it three times a day to keep it clean.   
Harry sat in the lone chair in the room that was a few feet away from Harry's bed. The doctor told him it was okay to stay in there until Louis woke up but as soon as the inevitable fit of pain kicked in, he'd have to leave while Louis was treated.   
He was in there for almost an hour when he heard Louis groan slightly. "Lou?" He whispered just in case it was his imagination. He didn't want to go and wake him up.   
"Harry?" Louis said back after a minute. "Harry, what happened?"   
"Louis, I'll tell you all about it later. Just please go back to bed before you start to feel the pain. Ok, for me?"   
"Alright Harry. Wait, Harry, can you kiss me?" Louis was really quiet. Maybe he knew he subconsciously knew he couldn't be loud.   
"I can kiss you gently." Harry got up and walked to Louis. He leaned down, being careful not to shake the bed and kissed Louis very carefully but still lovingly.   
"Thank you, Harry." Louis smiled and closed his eyes.   
"Now go back to bed, Louis. I'll be right here." Harry went back to his seat.   
"Ok, Harry." Louis said and within a few minutes, he was back asleep. He always breathed just a little heavier when he was asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Was it okay? Please let me know!! Just a quick comment so I know how you feel about the story so far. :)


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You hate me. I know you do and I'm soo so SO sorry for taking so long to post. A lot of crazy nonsense has gone on and to top it all off my laptop broke way back in August and I've just now been able to get a new one. But with my laptop breaking I lost all my old files because I'm done and didn't back anything up. So I've had to retype all of my chapters again and sometimes I just don't have the motivation to do that. But I hope this is all worth it for those who may have been waiting for an update! I didn't forget about y'all :)  
> Don't forget to comment and let me know what you think!

6 Months Later…   
Louis was finally in therapy and Harry drove him three times a week, there and back. The first few visits, Louis cried from the pain the whole car ride home and Harry had to carry him out of the car. By about the third week, Louis was adjusting and by week five, he was getting better. He was able to walk on the boot without crutches. He hobbled around and he lost his balance easily but he was seeing his own progress.   
With the accident and Louis having to basically learn how to walk again and regain his strength, the One Direction comeback had been put on hold. So when they'd finally gotten word from Simon a week ago that the plan to release 18 Again as the first single was back on as soon as the doctor's gave Louis the go-ahead to travel, they were ready.   
The divorce between Louis and Eleanor had quietly been finalized in the living room of Harry's house. The media found out the next day since the papers were common knowledge for the public to find somehow and there was nothing short of a shit storm when they found out that one of the members of One Direction had gone through a secret divorce. But things were good. Louis had convinced Eleanor to keep the house. It was their home with the girls and he'd feel comfortable coming there and seeing the girls. And as they got older, being in a familiar environment might soften the blow that they're parents weren't married anymore. The girls did like coming over to Louis' new place, without a doubt. Louis' new place was none other than Harry's humble abode where Teddy still had a nice yard to run around in. The girls didn't mind daddy taking the dog since they'd gotten it for him. And whenever they came over, they took turns running around the yard with him and their new friend Spencer. It was a nice turn of events for Louis to have everyone in his life happy and getting along. He also had Harry making breakfast for him every morning.   
Harry couldn't forget that the last thing he'd said to Louis before almost losing him was that they were going to meet for breakfast. As soon as Louis was home and able to eat, Harry began making breakfast. Sometimes it was just a bowl of yogurt and fruit, other times it could be more extravagant. But it never failed that Louis woke up to Harry in the kitchen.   
"You're like a housewife, Styles." Louis smiled one morning, tea in hand as he leaned against the counter.   
"I do my best, Tomlinson." He smiled back as he flipped a pancake perfectly in the pan.   
The others were fairing nicely as well. Zayn had sold his big family house to a kind family with a little girl who wanted something spacious for the big family they'd planned on having. That's what this house was made for. It wasn't for one man who still had trouble going into certain rooms without crying. He now lived in a smaller townhouse that had a greenway so he could walk in private and get some fresh air whenever he needed. He found that walks really helped clear his mind when he was feeling stressed. He also had two little kittens now. They were brothers and near inseparable so when the women who sold the one, Fitzy, said that he would miss his brother, Marble, a lot, Zayn decided to go ahead and get both of them. He knew how hard it was to be separated from your best mate.  
Niall and Elisa were going strong. After meeting from an unfortunate circumstance, they'd exchanged numbers and decided to go on a real date. From there, Niall found out things about love and relationships that he'd never gotten from being with Darian. They talked out their issues instead of brushing it under the rug and she actually listened to Niall when he spoke. Darian had always half listened and made everything a joke. And Elisa wasn't taking strange calls at weird times to play it off as family in another country. She had a son too, Duncan was his name. He was 12 but already about as tall as Niall. Elissa said Duncan's dad was extremely tall so he probably was taking after him. Duncan took well to Niall and they'd bonded enough to be able to go out with each other and do "father/son" activities. Elisa thought it was adorable that her two boys got along so well. Elisa was slowly moving stuff into Niall's house upon his request. She lived in a very tiny flat and they were at that point in that relationship where he felt comfortable waking up next to her everyday. Plus there would be plenty of space for all three of them.  
Liam and Sophia were the only ones who hadn't changed much. Jason had just had his third birthday and as treat they decided to take him to the zoo. Jason absolutely loved animals. All of his toys were little animal figurines, his books were all about the jungle, and his favorite movie was the Lion King.   
Nothing life altering had happened for the first time with the boys, which was good seeing as how their careers were about to re-explode upon the release of 18 Again and their album "Reunited."  
•••••  
"Morning, darling." Harry said and gave Louis a little peck as he shuffled and hobbled his way into the kitchen.   
"What's on the schedule for today, babe?"   
"Well first, breakfast." Harry held up two plates with assorted fruits on it and a bowl each of oatmeal. "Then, you have physical therapy at one. After that I'm gonna bring you back before I run out to pick up some groceries and get Spencer for the weekend."   
They both took seats at the breakfast table and began assembling their breakfast bowls.   
Louis sipped his tea as he stared at his plate.  
Harry took a spoonful of oatmeal and blueberries as he looked at Louis. "What?" he asked after swallowing his bite.   
"You know, I could always go with you. You don't have to drop me off."   
"You're gonna be so tired, Lou. Physical therapy wears you out and I have a lot to get at the store. I would hate to make you walk around with me when you're in pain." Harry raised his eyebrows at Louis as if to ask if that made sense.   
"I'll just bring my crutches. The only place I ever go anymore is to therapy. I'm tired of being in the same places. You know it's bad when I'm begging to go to Asda with you."   
"Only if you're sure, babe. I just worry about you sometimes." Harry smiled.   
Louis smiled back. "Thanks, Harry. I appreciate it, I just really need to get out."   
Harry and Louis ate the rest of their meal in silence. Almost a tense silence. Harry knew Louis was being driven crazy by his limited mobility, but if he wanted to have a full recovery, he had to respect the process.   
"I'm gonna take a quick shower and then we can head out, alright babe?" Harry asked and Louis only nodded as he made his way to the living room.   
While in the shower, Harry thought about Louis. They'd been a couple for half a year now and besides Eleanor and the girls, no one else knew. Not even the other guys. Despite what Harry had once said about forgetting about taking it slow, Louis' whole life was going at a snails pace and Harry didn't feel right unloading a boat load of feelings on him when he could barely handle his own at the moment. Harry fought the "I love you" every single time. He'd wanted to say it for so long. Longer than six months. And they obviously weren't sexual. Louis wasn't up for it and Harry understood. They slept in the same bed and Louis was comfortable, they cuddled. Besides that it was kissing.   
It had been forever since their last sexual encounter. Their last was actually their first and as brief, awkward, and messy as it was, Harry missed it. He wasn't sure if Louis felt the same way about that but he really did.   
•••••  
"Babe, I need to sit down." Louis said as he gripped onto his crutches for dear life as Harry stood debating which cereal to buy.   
"Want me to go get you an electronic buggy?" Harry said as he stepped over to give Louis some support.   
"No," Louis moved away from Harry, "I want you to get me a place to sit. I feel like I'm about to throw up."   
"Don't back away from me then, please. I'll get you to the bathroom if you feel nauseous." Louis continued to pull away from Harry. "Babe!"   
"Don't say that too loud." Louis said, looking aggravated and like he was going to throw up.   
"Louis, just let me help you." Harry knew what he was doing. He was pulling away because any physical contact would lead to a frenzy and Louis was scared of that. But Louis' exhaustion took over and he gave in to Harry's supportive arms.   
"Bathroom, please." He uttered. Harry held the cart with one hand and supported Louis with the other. He almost wanted to put Louis on his back so he could get there faster but that would only draw attention.   
"Excuse me." Harry said to a man and his younger son as they made their way to the bathroom. Harry left his cart in front. If anyone wanted what was in there, they were free to take it. This was a little more pressing than having to find oregano and pudding mix again.   
Harry had just gotten Louis to the stall when he began retching. Nothing was coming out seeing as how the last time he ate was several hours ago. Louis looked like a ghost as Harry rubbed his back.   
"Just breathe, babe." Louis closed his eyes and took shaky deep breaths. "Want me to get you a water bottle?" Louis shook his head.   
"I want you to stay with me." Louis said.   
Harry smiled and his heart fluttered. "Okay." He replied as he continued to rub Louis' back.  
•••••  
Louis was napping on the couch, Spencer was playing with her dolls on the floor and Harry was making a pasta bake for his little family. Teddy was tapping on the glass of the back door to be let out so Harry uttered a slight "shh" to the dog so he wouldn't wake up Louis but of course Teddy didn't understand and next thing he heard was the sound of Louis' clunky boot on the wood floors making his way to the kitchen.   
"How was your nap?" Harry asked, offering out a spoon of sauce for Louis to try.   
Louis raised his eyebrows "not bad! And uh, neither was the nap. I don't feel sick anymore. Just something about all the movement didn't sit well with me."   
Harry had an urge to say I told you so, but he decided against it. By the look on Louis' face, he knew.   
"Only a few minutes until dinner." Harry said as put the noodles and pasta into a pan and covered it with cheese.   
"Thanks for today. I'm an asshole sometimes and I just wanna be right all the time. I just really hate being confined while you and the guys get to go out all the time."   
"Lou, it's fine. This situation sucks and you're allowed to be moody." Harry grabbed Louis and pulled him closer. "I just don't want you pushing me away like you did. I realize it's hard when we're out in public but I only want to help."   
"I know, babe. I'm sorry." Louis gave Harry a sweet kiss before hugging him, swaying slightly. Those three little words on the tip of his tongue, but he still couldn’t say them.   
As they pulled away, they both noticed Spencer standing to the side of them with a doll in her hand. She was almost smiling. "Hey, little girl." Harry picked her up.  
"I'm hungry, daddy." She said in her cute little voice. "And… and when I looked, daddy wasn't there so I came here to say that, that, yeah."   
"Daddy's been cooking in here the whole time, baby girl."   
"No, not you. That daddy." Spencer pointed at Louis and smiled. "I was, I was scared. I didn't know where daddy went."   
Harry and Louis looked at each other. Tears welling up in both of their eyes.   
"Don't cry." Spencer reached up and put her little hand on Harry's cheek. "I finded him. It's all fine now!" She smiled and gave Harry a loving hug before wiggling slightly to let him know she wanted to be put down. She then ran back to the living room to continue playing until dinner was ready.   
"She called me daddy." Louis almost couldn't see his eyes were so filled with tears.   
"I know, babe! I guess she's gotten so used to you."  
"Babe, she doesn't even care or realize that it's not normal to have two dads. I'm not even her dad… babe!" Louis was being frantic so Harry grabbed him and smiled sweetly.   
"Babe, this is a good thing. Just think of it that way." Louis smiled back. Harry was right. This was a great thing. A little unexpected but it was a good thing and a cute thing all in one.  
•••••  
Spencer was tucked in and Louis and Harry were cuddled up together in bed, the tv lighting up the room.   
"Hey babe." Harry said, Louis shifted his head slightly to look at him. "Have you ever thought about having more kids?"   
Louis chuckled slightly. "I mean I always wanted a big family but uh, more kids isn't really on my mind at this very second. Why?"  
"No reason." Harry said.   
Louis knew there was a reason but he was too sleepy to carry it on, so he decided to use little energy he had left to burrow himself even further into Harry and fall asleep in his warmth.   
Harry smiled at his little Louis cuddled up against him. "I love you." He whispered before closing his own eyes and falling asleep.


	15. Chapter 15

It was 9am on a Monday morning when Simon called. Louis had been given the "okay" to start traveling again and Simon was ready to launch the campaign for 18 Again. Louis thanked his lucky stars One Direction never gained a reputation as dancers because he was still hobbling around on a fairly wonky leg.  
The first stop on the promotional tour for their single was to head over and see Scott Mills on good ole Radio 1. He was still going strong even 10 years later.  
Louis was a puddle of nerves in the backseat, Harry secretly holding his hand. The others still didn't know they were together. As far as anyone who wasn't in their immediate family was concerned, they were flatmates just like old times.  
"I'm so fucking excited, lads!" Niall said, clapping his hands as the car rolled into the lot. Louis started breathing a little heavier, to the point where Liam noticed.  
"What's wrong, Lou? Everyone's gonna love your song. Just like they always have." He tried to reassure him.  
The first couple years after the break, Louis put his incredible songwriting chops into writing for other artists. Nearly every song was a hit and those that weren't were still incredibly popular.  
"Yeah, man, you've got a knack for this. The fans are gonna love it!" Zayn gave him a pat on the shoulder. Louis felt Harry squeezing his hand a little tighter and when he looked over, Harry was smiling.  
The boys made they're way into the studio where they were welcomed with open arms by Scott. "Long time, no see!" He said. All of the boys got in their spots and situated their headsets. Within a few seconds, they were on air.  
"Now here's something most people gave up on hearing a long time ago, but we have got the newly resurrected One Direction in studio with us right now and twitter is going absolutely crazy with fans new and old alike." Scott looked at his laptop and laughed. The boys were beaming. "10 whole years, lads! How are all of ya? Louis, you're looking quite good after that accident."  
Louis nodded. "Thank you. Been a long and hard recovery but I honestly feel so good right now." He could see Harry smiling like an idiot on the other side of Niall.  
"Liam, you and Sophia good?"  
"As always! The Mrs. And the kids are listening at home." Liam giggled and gave his signature puppy dog smile.  
"Zayn, we won't dwell on it because it must be incredibly hard for you still but we're so deeply sorry for what you've gone through." Scott got soft. He was good at being sympathetic.  
"Thank you. It has been tough but I have an angel and I know this is what she wants me doing." Zayn smiled. Liam gave him a pat and Louis gave a small side hug.  
"And Niall! You've got yourself a new lady in your life. We've been seeing you out with her lately and everyone wants to know who she is."  
Niall got a little red and smiled big. "She's amazing. That's all I'll say for now." He laughed and so did Scott. It was cute how quiet Niall was because they all knew how shy Elissa was. She didn't mind that everyone knew about them, she just didn't need to talk about it all the time.  
"Styles you have a new lady in your life too, little Spencer. How's the little cutie doing?"  
"Absolutely wonderful, my friend." Harry beamed over his little girl. "She's so smart."  
"And extremely talkative!" Louis accidentally chimed in. Letting the words slip out of his mouth without a thought until they were already out there. His eyes got big and for the live viewers, they would be able to see his blunder.  
"She really is." Harry quickly recovered. "Whenever anyone comes 'round, she talks their heads off." Louis went back to a calm expression thanks to his boy. Harry quickly scanned over the boys in order to make quick contact with Louis as if to say "I got you" reassuringly.  
"Well boys, this is the big moment the whole world has been waiting for now for 10 whole years. An entire decade and it's finally happening! Are you excited?"  
The boys all said yes excitedly back at him.  
"One Direction is excited, I'm excited, twitter is about to lose it if I don't hurry this up. Here it is world, your Radio 1 exclusive first listen to One Direction's brand new single, 18 Again!" Just like that, the intro was playing and Harry's voice came through. It had an indie rock vibe that would be a treat to their older fans who watched them grow into this phase of music. The song had a sound similar to Girl Almighty and No Control, two other songs Louis had knocked out of the park with their loving fans so long ago. This would also be a refreshing change from the bubblegum pop the new fans were hearing all the time.  
"Twitter is going mental!" Louis heard one of the girls say from behind the booth. Scott nodded in agreement as the song went into the chorus. Louis was surprised at how much his voice shined through in it. He looked at each of the boys who seemed to really be vibing with the song. They were all getting so excited.  
The song continued on, highlighting each of the others parts. Zayn hit a high note towards the end of the song. Louis wrote it in last minute knowing the fans would go mental as soon as they heard it.  
When it finished playing, the boys beamed and Scott sat there staring at his screen. "You broke twitter." He kept clicking refresh on the website that just wouldn't reload.  
"Ours is down too!" The girl from earlier called out.  
"You lot broke the internet!" Scott said laughing. "From what I've gathered, your fans quite liked it! Hell, I liked it! Lads, well done!"  
The interview lasted a little longer, waiting to see if twitter or the Radio 1 site would start working again before the boys had to leave, but it was no use.  
A mob of fans were waiting outside the studio for them as they left. It was a crazy mix of 20-somethings and teenagers. Liam swore he saw Lewis Jones and his little crew somewhere in the crowd but unfortunately for them, they didn’t get a picture with the boys this time.  
"That was insane!" Liam shouted when they made it to their car.  
"I can't believe that just happened." Niall exclaimed right back. The whole car ride back to the office was filled with excitement and a celebratory champagne toast. They listened in to the radio where it seemed almost every station was talking about One Direction's new single. They heard it three different times in the short ride.  
Once back at the office they all headed to their own cars and discussed plans for the night to go out and celebrate.  
Harry and Louis made their way to Harry's car. "I can't believe that just happened, babe. They loved your song!" Harry grabbed Louis's hand and gave it a squeeze before pulling him close into a hug.  
The office was far away from where any cameras would catch them so they enjoyed their moment "out in the open." Louis could feel the words on the tip of his tongue but he still didn't dare say them.  
"Thank you, love." Louis rested his head on Harry's chest and breathed in the scent of his cologne. It was up there with one of his favorite smells.  
They stayed like that for a few moments, enjoying the peace. Home was fun, but it was far from peaceful with several little kids coming in and out and a big dog knocking over anything within tails distance of it. And it's not like there was anywhere else they could go.  
That's when Louis pulled away fast.  
"Babe?" Harry asked, concerned.  
"No, babe, I just thought of something!"  
"What's that?" Harry asked, grabbing Louis's hands again.  
"Next weekend after we go to the states, we have off, right? All the girls will be with their mums that weekend as well so I'm thinking, maybe you and I could go somewhere. Just us."  
"Like, a get out of the house sort of thing?"  
Louis nodded and smiled. Harry could literally see the heart eyes.  
They hugged again before getting in the car and driving home where they spent the rest of the night packing for their trip around the UK the next couple of days before heading out with the other lads and their families. The 18 Again single drops on iTunes at midnight officially and their album will become available for preorder. After much debate over what they'd title it, the boys all decided upon Reunited. The cover art that they'd shot was a photo booth style set with different picture reels of the boys scattered about. Saturday night they were taking a plane to LA where they'd make their rounds around the US. They'd be back by next Thursday with a weekend off before they taped a spot for Chatty Man and head off promptly to Australia. It was about to be crazy again but with 10 years off, each of the boys was more than ready for this.  
•••••  
"One Direction breaks record formerly held by Taylor Swift for fastest selling single"  
"1D comes back with the biggest come back of all time"  
"18 Again goes number 1 in way more than 'Turdy Seven' countries"  
"One Direction's album Reunited smashes pre-order sales. Is it a possible for an album that's not even out yet to go number 1?"  
The headlines, the reviews, and the records came piling in as One Direction made the rounds with their new single. With every place came more and more fans, more excitement, and more "breaking twitter."  
Ryan Seacrest, Ellen DeGeneres, and Jimmy Fallon all agreed that they hadn't seen anything like this in the longest time when they boys made their stop with them.  
It was very early Friday morning that next week when Harry and Louis walked through the door of their house. No little girls running around and Teddy was with Eleanor while he was gone so knocked over flower vases or nose marks on the sliding glass door. Louis looked up at his boy as they stood in their doorway thinking over all the craziness over the past two weeks. Sneaking into each others hotel rooms at 3am when everyone else has gone to sleep and cuddling the night away to whatever stupid program was on the tv. Stealing glances and smiles every time someone looked away. Harry giving Louis bedroom eyes when the world seemingly went crazy over his newest creation. Louis giving them right back to Harry when ever he opened his mouth and mindlessly went on about how exciting this wall was to whichever radio or late night host asked that day.  
They left that day for their weekend away in Paris. How extremely corny and gooey and romantic of Louis, yes, but that's what Harry liked. Harry liked Paris and he liked that mushy romantic crap that drove most guys up a wall. And that's exactly what Louis had planned out for them. It only took them a few minutes to make their way to their bed where they got under their covers and cuddled each other. They'd been sleeping in some pretty comfy beds lately but nothing felt better to Louis than his boy in their bed.  
Harry made a light breakfast of fruit and yogurt that morning while they packed for their weekend with what was left of their clothes that weren't already making their way to Australia for their week there. Louis instructed Harry to pack at least one "nice outfit" and whatever the hell else he wanted didn't matter. Louis had been packed since before they left. He was more than ready for tonight. Being in Paris with his boy after the most incredible 2 weeks of being back on the road with his boys performing a song that he wrote for a world of people who were so incredible excited. This was what Louis had been needing for the past 10 years.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back, back, back... Back again, gain, gain.... The fic is back, back, back... Tell a friend, friend, friend.   
> Guysssss it's been so long! I've had the worst case of writers block but only with this story because I have been trucking along with two others fics that I plan on posting soon because I don't know if I can wait until this one ends.   
> With the recent events of Zayn leaving, I wasn't sure if I wanted to continue on with story but I've put so much work into this fic and Zayn will always have a place in all of our hearts so this one will continue on in a world where Zayn didn't leave.   
> I've decided that this story will have 20 chapters so only five more to go! You'd think it'd have a really quick end but with my luck we'll be here for a while. Goodness gracious I'm the worst.   
> But anyway, please let me know what you think with a comment and/or kudos. I'd appreciate it a lot!   
> twitter/insta- ronnieboobear  
> tumblr- hte-hemmings.tumblr.com


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